Two for the Road

We don’t watch as much Western Conference hockey as we’d like – it’s past our bedtimes.  For those who do, and whose teams ended their 2011-2012 seasons last night, this one’s for you.

The Dallas Stars finished in 9th place last year too.  Frustrated but the hopeful.  The ultimate hockey fan emotions.

Flames fans are a tough bunch, just ask Lindsay.  You can’t ever get tickets, and they haven’t made the playoffs in three years.  That’s dedication.  Do the damned Canucks have to be first *every* year?!

The Avalanche have a few up-and-comers among our favorite players to watch.  They had some rich years, and we think they’re coming back.  More Landeskoging, please.

I once figured that based on all the consecutive sellouts the Wild had, including pre-season games, that you could put a second NHL franchise in their parking lot and it would see more tickets than the Coyotes every night.  We are beyond impressed.

Anaheim.  I don’t know what the hell happened there, but this team should be tearing it up.  I’d like to see them give this top notch cast another season – Ryan, Perry, and Getzlaf if he can find his mojo.  And Teemu, please play forever.

The Oilers are rebuilding away.  With Eberle, Hall and Nugent-Hopkins clicking and a strong team behind them, it’ll be watch out world.

Columbus, don’t give up.  We know it hurts with Nash and that the wait has been long.  We hope a new chapter is starting.  Oh, and we’re coming to visit for the All-Star Game.

So long to the favorites who finished – play some golf, get healthy and come back hungry.  Now,on to those still left.

Around The League In Milestone Minutes

 It was a banner weekend ladies as many of our men made history and milestones: chillin in the dome with Jerome: Iggy got his 500^th goal.

 Teemu got his 651st goal by the end of the night.

 Little Danny Briere put on his big boy pants and got in his third ever fight and had a hat trick to boot.

Shane Doan got his first hat trick EVER with .o1 to go – YES and the Coyotes have really needed SOMETHING to get their party started.

And faster than you can say “Excuse me but does this stick in the face make me look fat?” the PA put the hammer down on the realignment and the Blue Jackets have fired their coach. Whew. There was a crap load of exciting hockey happening this weekend and I didn’t even cover Corey Perry’s hat trick  – wait I just did.

So if you missed any of it, I suggest you watch the above because it was pure hockey magic. A banner weekend of nuggeted hockey gold wrapped tightly like a firecracker that exploded a little late for the new year but we’ll take it any way!

Foxy Friday: Bobby Ryan

New Jersey’s own Bobby “Silver” Ryan is a gem.  He could be Foxy Friday based solely on his Tweets or on this photo alone.  But no, Bobby has both.

We never stood a chance.

There were 1.2 billion trade rumors about Bobby earlier this season, but he is staying put in Anaheim.  This team has a lot of fun even if they don’t win as much as they used to.  Case in point: Hula hooping (and Getzlaf’s little dog, hahahahahaha.)

You can YouTube the Ryan vs. Ryan videos from the 2010 Olympics – they are gold, even if this Bobby isn’t.  And you’ve gotta get Bobby’s Life Lessons from Twitter:

Not surprisingly, Bobby’s pretty good with girls:

And he knows how to have a good time:

We agree with Bobby on a great many things:

Except when he is Team Edward:

He made up for it by Tweeting this photo:

Not bad considering...

All this aside, Bobby Ryan had a seriously traumatic and troubled childhood.  You can read about it here and just marvel at how a kid came from this to seem so nice and normal.  His hockey talent is a gift, but he overcame a lot for the chance to put it to work.

Bobby has 10 goals and 7 assists on the season.  Anaheim is seriously struggling, with the second-worst record in the League and only 23 points.  They hired Bruce Boudreau fresh from the firing squad, so hopefully BB can turn things around for this team.  They certainly have the talent, the sense of humor and (in my experience) the coldest arena in the NHL.  They won the Cup in ’07 – wow, it seems like much longer.  Those of us who’ve lived in SoCal could get behind another Ducks victory and we’d like it to include this guy.

Homework: Gongshow Hockey’s visit to Bobby’s house in Idaho [link].

New Coach, New Girlfriend, New Attitude?

Let's get this party started

So Ovi has a new coach, a new girlfriend so let’s hope that leads to a new attitude! Right? Well if the first game was any indication, I might jump ship – WHAT?! Just kiddding. That sound you just heard was Pants and Chuck simulatenously dropping over.

but only one named Letang

I’m  so excited for the battle of the hotties tonight so remember to get your half rack ready and you HAVE TO DRINK everytime they mention St. Sid. This is mandatory. Then tell us how it went – if you recover – because I’m telling you, you’ll be amazed!

The Catzipals new attitude? Let's hope so

I can’t decide if I’m going to watch the Pit feed or the Caps feed because I kind of a have a crush on Staggy. He’s a glass is- over-flowing kind of guy. But Joe B. and Locker make me laugh because they get side-tracked alot. It won’t matter which feed you watch because St. Sid will be ALL OVER it. Let’s hope  they all borrowed Ovi’s razor through. SRSLY!

even i think he looks better this way

Here’s the line up and I KNOW! WHERE’S LETANG!?! *SUPER SIGH* Ovi is going to be upset that his real boy toy is not playing. How can he pull off his jersey and play slip and tickle with his favorite pengiun?

the most epic bromance - EVER

 PENGUINS

Kunitz-Crosby-Dupuis
Sullivan-Malkin-Neal
Cooke-Staal-Kennedy
Asham-Park-Adams
(Vitale, MacIntyre)

CAPITALS

Ovechkin-Backstrom-Brouwer
Eakin-Johansson-Semin
Chimera-Laich-Ward
Hendricks-Halpern-Knuble-Perreault

On a side note, the Anaheim Ducks scooped BB as their coach so I wish him the best of luck and since every knows that I also have a crush on that ‘other’ #8 Teemu, GO DUCKS! DD is #8, Teemu is #8 and Ovi is #8 and Letang is #58 …. go crazy 8’s!

My life. So hard.

Things I Love:  America.  Twitter.  Hockey.

And whoever made this .gif on Tumblr:

The Finnish Flash Drops The Gloves During Final Freeway Face-Off!

I don't want to love you but I can't help it!

Last night’s game against the Kings wasn’t exciting for me since they lost and looked lost on the ice especially when Captain DT. Brown went out for a bit with a sore ouchie. (not minimizing his pain, just borrowing BB’s explanation for hockey player’s injuries) The only bright spot was an interview with Kopitar from the sidelines with Heidi Androl still trying to hit that! I think he might be that the last King’s hold out she hasn’t hit.

With a little over three minutes left in the game, tempers flared. Clifford cross-checks Teemu and Teemu returns the favor with a nasty elbow to the face and then Teemu gets double teamed with Richardson coming in on him. Brookbank takes Clifford and then Teemu squares off with Richardson.

While I do love Teemu (obviously) I don’t want any of my boys having to face him in the play-offs. He is still too dangerous.

Not bad for the Foxy-Forty-Finnish-Flash in his final regulation free-way face-off finishing with a flashy fight!

Another Great 8 Gets a 3-fer.

hat trick for hottie

Old men getting it done! Teemu Selanne pulls a hat trick out of his ass to put the Ducks past Colorado tonight. There must be something about that number. I secretly have a crush on the old man and it’s not because he wears #8 too like TBG and Ovi. OK, maybe because he does. No, not really. He just get’s it done like Lidstrom, the other old man in the NHL but he seems to get less attention. This is his 22nd hat trick, 124th multi-goal game and this makes him the 4th over-40 dude to get a hat trick. Whew. 40 – the new 20?

 

Mind Over Brain Matter

So to quote many a hockey player and coach, hockey is 90% mental and 10% physical. OK – I’ll buy that for a hot second since it was regurgitated out of Kris Letang’s luscious mouth recently. (I’m paraphrasing him more intelligently.) Where I am I going with this? Is it me or are many teams suffering A LOT of injuries lately? I was perusing the IR HOT LIST for the Caps and noticed BAMM-SCOOBY DOO – there are a lot of players out. I was watching the Freeway Face-off last night (because my beautiful double D TBG was playing) and wondering where Frankenface was AKA Getzlaf. Out. Injured. I’m not going to list all the major playas who are out or have been out because if you’re a fan, you already know the who’s who of Boo-boo ville.

on the Caps most wanted now?

However, I do have a great quote from BB of the Caps about Backstrom from his EPIC showdown hair on hair scrap with Letang on Monday. See, Nicky B has not missed a game in his entire NHL career which would be 307 games! Impressed? I knew you would be. And even though the Hot Mop out of Pit fractured the Hot Mop from Sweden’s thumb, Nicky B. is still planning on playing tomorrow because according to BB, “I’m saying he’s playing tomorrow. He’s fine. He’s got a sore ouchie that’s not preventing him from playing. He’s a tough kid.”

mikey may be kissing nickys boo-boo and more if he misses a game

So all the hot hair is not just covering access to brain matter or keeping their heads warm, it evidently is covering a 90% mental desire to play hockey – I was never any good at math – whatever. Too bad all that hockey gear covers like 100% of all that hockey body hotness! 😉 If only we could get them to play the All Star Game naked! Someone get me Brendan Shanahan on the phone NOW! I have a brilliant idea for next year!

Ovechkin Punches One Through and The Other Alex Hats A Trick!

Hopefully my view in SJ!

The Caps finally snap their regulation losing streak against Pacific Division teams this season beating the Ducks 7-6! Semin had his FOURTH hat trick of the season (video). He is one of only two players in the NHL right now with that honor. For a dude with a scoring drought, he certainly knows how to come back from them with style!

vodka shots for EVERYONE!

My honey Ovi had a masterful goal basically willing the puck into the net with brute force while falling between two Ducks – using my now infinite wisdom from reporting on BATTLE OF THE BLADES, I’d call it a true – SHOOTING THE DUCK – so take that Todd Warriner. Anything you can do, Ovechkin will do it better AND score a goal while doing it (video). 

NOT Ovi's goal

Oh and did I mention Varly got pulled after the first period – OK – Mr. Cherrie says,  “He didn’t start the second period.” But then I can’t say – “Varly got pulled like a Pork sammy left out on a hot summer day. Smelled like one too.” 😦  Have I mentioned – WHEN ARE THE CAPS GOING TO GET A REAL GOALIE? No offense my sweet, Neuvy. You make an awesome #2 and maybe a real goalie when you hit puberty. No, Yes? Maybe? A goalie? Not an imploding Russian Spy satellite or Lon Chaney’s bastard son. But something akin to a wall, not, let’s say a sieve, like this blog? BB, can you hear me now?

I’m just getting warmed up for SJ. Packing bags, putting on the lucky sweats and the magic necklace – oh – you all didn’t SEE THAT. Well, that will be another post. Pants will let you know if she survives 24 hours with me! 😉

With Great Power, Comes Great Responsibility

ESPN.com recently posted its NHL Power Rankings for Week 20.  Some teams shot up the rankings like the Anaheim Ducks, Los Angeles Kings , and Columbus Blue Jackets.  While some faltered like the Washington Capitals and Pittsburgh Penguins.  (Pants and Dawn are extremely sad pandas.  Like really really sad.)

As a Bruins fan, I’m glad to see that the B’s are holding steady in the top 10.  They’ve been playing well, despite their back to back losses to the #3 Red Wings.  The line of Patrice Bergeron, Mark “Wrecking Ball” Recchi, and Brad Marchand is arguably one of the top lines in all of the NHL.  They hit, they produce major points, and they work hard each and every shift.  Marchand’s nickname should be “Motoscooter”!  He is wonderfully aggressive on the fore-check and is having a breakout season for the B’s.  Chuck likes.

All out. All the time.

Glad to see that Rick Nash and the Columbus Blue Jackets moving up the rankings (from 26th to 19th).  They’ve been winning.  Nasher been getting points (5 points in last 5 games).  Rick gets named a Foxy Friday and his team’s starts playing better?  A coincidence?  I think not.

Look at Patrice Bergeron.  Before being a Foxy Friday Honoree?  Having an okay season.  After FF?  Hot like fire.

WUYS is more powerful than we thought.

So, where does your favorite team rank?  Do you agree or disagree with Burnside’s list?  Do you think the Flyers can overtake the Canucks with the acquisition of forward Kris Versteeg?

Discuss.

2010-2011 Power Rankings: Week 20