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A Moment Of Silence-Please

9 Sep

My bat phone rang last night and no it wasn’t Kris Letang calling me to sing me to sleep – or whisper sweet French nothings as I drift off and dream of Ovi finally returning to Pre-2005 form.

A girl has her limits …Ovi!

Did that really happen?

Did that really happen?

I thought it would be just a bad dream. But no. It really did happen.

Yes, Dawn, I retired. I'm sorry.

Yes, Dawn, I retired. I’m sorry.

A moment of silence please as I morn the retirement of Miikka Kiprusoff. I’ve already made him the exalted and honored Foxy Friday. Everyone knows I love goalies. I’ve already said all there is to say about this God of Net-minders; this Wall of determination who could literally make the puck turn away from his net by sheer mental fortitude.

But I will smile for you once, ok maybe twice.

But I will smile for you once, ok maybe twice.

See?

See?

Calgary – that was the last nail your coffin dudes. You don’t miss someone like Kiprusoff. You morn the loss because there are few and far between goalie talents like him.

I bang my stick and thank you Kippy for the years of hard work and dedication you gave to the sport, to your teammates and Calgary without worrying about jumping ship to win a cup.

Enjoy these highlights. There won’t be anymore.

What It Feels Like for A Kings Fan

13 Jun

Today, WUYS has a very special guest post from my friend and über Kings fan extraordinaire, Aaron Vaccaro.  As you may remember, I wrote a dedication post to Aaron and my cousin Tom right before the Kings started the Stanley Cup Finals.  Now that they’ve actually won it, we wanted to bring Aaron into the WUYS fold to share what it feels like to be a Kings fan right at this very moment.


Let me start off by saying it’s a good thing this isn’t a vlog otherwise you’d be watching me fill my playoff beard with tears of joy.

Here’s what you need to know about me…

My name is Aaron Vaccaro.  I am a Los Angeles Kings fan. I’ve been a Los Angeles Kings fan for twenty-five of my twenty-nine years on this Earth.

Baby Aaron. Just as cute as Baby Toews.

Being a Kings fan has been a rough road. very rough road. The kind of road you only expect to encounter in a third world country.

But none of that matters anymore. Because as I write this, the Kings have been Stanley Cup champions for just over twenty-four hours and I’ve had a case of goose bumps for just as long.

For those who have been living under a rock for the last two months, you unfortunately missed one of the most historical runs by any NHL team ever.

I could give you all of the record-setting facts and figures, but Chuck and Pants didn’t ask me to do a guest post to bore you with that kind of stuff. They instead asked me to try to convey what it feels like to be a Kings fan right now… Well, I’ll tell you… it’s amazing.

Aaron is all his hockey glory.

This has been a rollercoaster of a year for us fans as much as it was for the team itself. We came into the season with high expectations only to have them all but dashed by December, which unfortunately was not unfamiliar territory for Kings fans.

We all started to drink a lot heavier, thinking it was another season where we’d be on the outside looking in as some other team would taste the glory that we’d never gotten to taste.

But then the tide started to turn after a coaching change was made, a trade deadline acquisition brought Jeff Carter to the team, and everything started to click. The Kings managed to squeak into the playoffs and the “Team of Destiny” train left the station bound for eternal glory.

Was I at the game? No. Mainly because I’m not a celebrity, agent, doctor, lawyer, or fan willing to sell off the rights to their first born.

Okay, to be honest, I would’ve sold off the rights to my first-born if that was acceptable tender.

Do I wish I could’ve been at the game? Of course. That’s a dumb question, and I’m mad I even asked myself that.

But alas, I was instead relegated to watching the game at our local dive bar. But this wasn’t just any dive. Sure, they have PBR on tap, and a mean plate of onion rings, but they were also filled with wall-to-wall Kings fans making it the best dive bar in Los Angeles as far as I was concerned.

We were surrounded by other fellow fans that had spent years bleeding black, silver, white, purple, gold (okay, so we’ve had a lot of different jersey colors…)

There was lots of drinking, cheering, high-fiving, and bearded men hugging complete strangers, most of which were also bearded men.  It was a truly beautiful site.

Aaron and his friend…who looks suspiciously a little like Mike Richards.

Up until two months ago, I was used to getting this question: “You’re a Kings fan? Why?”

My answer – “We don’t choose the teams we want to be fans of.  They choose us.

They captivate us, enthrall us, and make us realize we’ll do whatever it takes (including murdering a hobo) if that means we would get the chance to see that team win a championship. And believe me, I was close to committing homicide.

People don’t realize what it was like for us to watch the Anaheim Ducks win the Stanley Cup back in 2007.

I’ll tell you what it was like…utterly humiliating.

Not only did we have to watch a team based on Emilio Estevez movie win our trophy, but we also had to watch them do it in only fourteen seasons of existence. For those of you counting at home, it took the Kings thirty one years longer. Compound onto that every Ducks fan reminding us of this fact for the past five years and you could probably taste our pain and sorrow.

But that all ended last night. We will know longer be ridiculed. We’re once again the only team that matters in Southern California.

Disco Inferno.

Los Angeles is a town that isn’t considered to have much of an identity. Geographically spread out, it’s easy to think there is no unity in this city. Hell, I even questioned it for a period of time. But these last few weeks, I’ve never felt closer to my fellow Angelenos. Sure, you can scoff and say, “Well, those are just bandwagoners. They’re not real fans.” You’re right. They probably are just bandwagoners. But who cares?! It’s people paying attention to hockey in a town where all the AM sports talk radio is completely dominated by Lakers, Clippers, and Dodgers. Don’t worry, there’s plenty of room on the bandwagon for all of you. People accuse Los Angeles of simply just “loving a winner.” Hell yeah we do. Every town loves a winner. Tell me a town that hates to see their teams win and I promise to streak naked through Downtown L.A. in nothing but my Stanley Cup champion hat.

Dan Patrick is boss, ya’ll.

2012 will go down as easily one of the greatest, if not the greatest years of my life. Not only did I get to witness the Kings hoist that beautiful piece of metal, but I’m also getting married to the love of my life in three weeks. It doesn’t get much better than that, folks.

Ooh! Unless I can convince Dustin Brown to spend his day with the Cup at our wedding. Anybody got his number?

Hey Dustin, call me. Maybe.

I couldn’t be more proud to call myself a Kings fan for these past twenty-five years and have no doubt I will be one till my dying breath. Because that’s what it means to love a team this much. Now, go enjoy yourselves, Kings. You deserve it. We did it, boys…

Go Kings Go!

Check out Aaron on the twitter at @badmovienitecom or on his website www.badmovienite.com


Tonight is the Night?

6 Jun

Once, a cat named Lucifer messed with Cinderella.  She chased him off with a broom.  See what I’m saying?

Not pictured: LA Kings

Chuck and I are Red Sox fans, which means leading a playoff series 3-0 is not enough for us.  We know miracles can happen.  (In case you don’t, in ’04 the Yankees were up 3-0 in the ALCS.  The Red Sox won 4 straight, then another 4 to sweep the Cardinals for the World Series.  The screaming, people.  I can’t even describe it.)   The moral of the story is: we don’t count people out.

Tonight, the Kings will try to sweep the Devils to win the first Stanley Cup in franchise history, in front of their home crowd.  This idea gives us crazy butterflies.  Chuck & Dawn are all for the Kings, and I cry every single year when the Cup is presented, no matter who wins.  I just see rainbows and sprinkles and dreams coming true.  It’s like a Lifetime movie.

If the Kings win tonight, it will be the 21st Finals sweep in the modern era (since the NHL went to a best-of-seven format in 1939).  Sweeps happen more often than a series goes to 7 games (16 times).  Only one NHL team has ever come back from 3-0 down in the Final to win the Cup – the 1942 Maple Leafs.

Despite Peggy’s best efforts, the Cup has arrived.

Since 1939, trends in winning the Stanley Cup Final – from NHL.com [link, the formatting is awful]:

•  Teams winning Game One have won the Cup 54 of 69 times (78.3%).

•  Teams winning both Games One and Two have won the Cup 41 of 44 times (93.2%).

•  Teams winning Games One, Two and Three have won the Cup 24 of 25 times (96%).

More sweep fun facts – ESPN.com [link].

15 fun facts about the Kings – USAToday.com [link]

If you’re thinking what we’re thinking, it’s about this.  Or, more accurately, this happening inside a Ke$sha video filmed in a strip-club-on-a-yacht off Huntington Beach where Snoop Dogg drops from a fireworks-shooting helicopter for a rap solo about best friends forever.

I’m just saying that Cup parade/party photos get us through the summer and you know the Kings’ would be epic.  Twitter would melt.  I’d buy stock in pancakes, donuts, liquor and glitter.    Something tells me that Patrick Elias won’t be dancing shirtless on a table a la Tyler Seguin (or even clothed like Patrick Sharp) but we think TBG Drew Doughty might.

(SIDE NOTE: If you Google “Tyler Seguin dance shirtless,” the #5 photo result is Chuck & Tyler and #12 is me & Chuck.  You guys search that term and find our site A LOT, pervs.)

But we’re getting ahead of ourselves.  Things are far from over with 60 minutes on the clock and a goalie who has won 3 Stanley Cups – that’s every Cup the Devils have ever won, on Brodeur’s shoulders.  So, down but not out?  Will the Devils slow the Kings 15-2 playoff run and rain on their parade?  If they get one, they head back to NJ for Game Five on Saturday night.  The Kings have won 10 straight road games… but you have to start somewhere.

What the What?!

24 May

Last night was bonkers.  The Devils scored three goals while I was making mac & cheese, then the Rangers got them all back.  The Rangers were bad, then great.  Brodeur had one of those moments, like in the back of a cab when you know you’re going to throw up and you have to decide: pull over or window?!

Then you don’t make either one in time.

In the end, the Devils put it away on a goal from surprisingly foxy Ryan Carter.  Where have you been all our lives?  New Jersey is now up 3-2 in the series.

Will Friday be the night we see this year’s other Stanley Cup contenders emerge?  Chuck says no.  I say Zach.

This post was just so I could use this picture.

I should have known that Pam (@itsalwayssunnyinnj) made this picture.  She is a girlgenius.

Western Conference: Gm 5ive

22 May

Tonight the Kings will try again to advance to the Stanley Cup Finals.  They’ve lost just two games in three rounds.

The @LAKings Twitter feed is spectacular, full of things only Judge Judy could get away with saying in a courtroom.  I’d just like to remind the Washington Capitals that I’m available for snarky and potentially trouble-making social media commentary.  Will work for hugs.

For the Kings, I feel a single loss in a series is good.  You don’t want to finish too soon and sit around waiting for NYR/NJD to sort itself out.  (Note: This didn’t hurt the Kings after they swept Round Two, but the Coyotes only needed five games to advance.  The Rangers and Devils could go all the way.)

For our Coyotes pals – hey, comebacks happen.  We’ve all prayed for them at one time or another.  I hope the number of $60 tickets available for tonight’s game on Ticketmaster doesn’t mean people are giving up.

Chuck and Dawn are all Team LA.  At this point, I’m really more interested in early-morning walks on the beach in pajamas with puppies.  If he’s got a day off, Mike Richards can come too.

S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y Night!

10 May

Last night’s Caps/Rangers Game 6 was officially the most fun I’ve ever had at a hockey game.  Maybe it was the Jeff Schultz Fan Club in front of us at warm-ups – hey, there really is someone for everyone.  Maybe it was the “Let’s Let Karl’s Dogs Out” sign or the Flo Rida dance party.  It could have been this hug from iCarly:

We sat with the near the best people ever.  To our left, a mom with an adorable 1-year old baby girl in her lap.  She passed said baby to dad so she could have her hands free when yelling, “Call something, you blind $&#*@*^ ref!!” at the top of her lungs.  The guys behind us were doing NHL Mystery Science Theatre 3000 – I wish I’d recorded them.  Gems like:

Person in crowd: “Let’s go Rangers!”

Guy behind us: “I can’t hear you over the winning!”

Instead of a tired, boring “Lundqvist, you suck!”, we got, “Who puts a V after a Q?!”  and a million more.  It helped reduce the tension of holding my breath for sixty minutes.

There were also a couple of goals.  (In Russian, I love the way he says, “Green.”)

Nicky lost his helmet and we all swooned like Disney princesses.  All 4 feet, 11 inches of Keith Aucoin was getting in Brian Boyle’s… well, somewhere around his rib cage, I guess, but it looked feisty.  Joel Ward got a HUGE cheer when announced in the starting lineup.  Chimera was a beast – he wanted to fight so badly, but we prefer when he scores.  Best facial expression of the night:

Holtby was outstanding.  You should see all the 70 shirts in this place now.  He woulda (shoulda, coulda) had the shutout if not for Ryan Gosling Carl Hagelin’s uncalled goalie interference, but who cares?  The moment of “Oh God, not again!” panic when Gaborik scored with 50 seconds left passed, and the game was over.

Now we’ve all got Saturday Date Night with the Rangers and Caps at 7:30 PM.  Put on your dancing shoes!

Jersey Sure

9 May

The fates came out of their hole, looked for their shadows and decreed we shall see more of this:

And no more of this:

Okay, maybe one more:

We extend sympathies to our Flyers fans.  Yes really, even though I hate them.  Losing sucks no matter if you’re my team or a great looking guy in an ugly suit.  Reasons and examinations for the loss, please report immediately to October where you’re all meaningless.

A big congratulations to our Devils fans.  NJ gave a huge performance, and frankly their discipline scares the crap out of me.  After watching the Flyers expose every single Penguins weakness then strip and sell them for parts, I thought they were rolling.  But NJ never gave Philly an inch, never let them crack that shell.  On top of great hockey, they played a great mental game.

The Devils await the winner of the Rangers/Capitals series.  I can’t say anything else for fear of a jinx, but more on this after round two is over.