Tag Archives: Edmonton Oilers

Two for the Road

8 Apr

We don’t watch as much Western Conference hockey as we’d like – it’s past our bedtimes.  For those who do, and whose teams ended their 2011-2012 seasons last night, this one’s for you.

The Dallas Stars finished in 9th place last year too.  Frustrated but the hopeful.  The ultimate hockey fan emotions.

Flames fans are a tough bunch, just ask Lindsay.  You can’t ever get tickets, and they haven’t made the playoffs in three years.  That’s dedication.  Do the damned Canucks have to be first *every* year?!

The Avalanche have a few up-and-comers among our favorite players to watch.  They had some rich years, and we think they’re coming back.  More Landeskoging, please.

I once figured that based on all the consecutive sellouts the Wild had, including pre-season games, that you could put a second NHL franchise in their parking lot and it would see more tickets than the Coyotes every night.  We are beyond impressed.

Anaheim.  I don’t know what the hell happened there, but this team should be tearing it up.  I’d like to see them give this top notch cast another season – Ryan, Perry, and Getzlaf if he can find his mojo.  And Teemu, please play forever.

The Oilers are rebuilding away.  With Eberle, Hall and Nugent-Hopkins clicking and a strong team behind them, it’ll be watch out world.

Columbus, don’t give up.  We know it hurts with Nash and that the wait has been long.  We hope a new chapter is starting.  Oh, and we’re coming to visit for the All-Star Game.

So long to the favorites who finished – play some golf, get healthy and come back hungry.  Now,on to those still left.

Foxy Friday: Jordan Eberle

17 Feb

Jordan Eberle really wants to be our intern.  He applies twice a week – and those are just the resumes we see.  Imagine how many Intern Jeff Skinner has intercepted!

As “Job Experience,” Jordan humbly mentioned that he’s s a spectacular hockey player.  He has 25 G/30 A this season, another in the Oilers rebuilding campaign.  Edmonton is last in the Northwest Division (50 points), but since it’s Canada they still sell a lot of tickets (19th in overall attendance this season), and even more Eberle, Hall and Nugent-Hopkins jerseys.

He even sits like Mike Green.

He also had “Awards and Recognition” – Jordan’s first-ever NHL goal, scored in his debut game last season, was voted NHL Goal of the Year (on Facebook) and TSN’s Play of the Year.

So really, Ebs is perfect for us.  Under “Qualifications,” he listed being 21 (because we have standards), 5′ 11″ and Canadian with excellent eyebrows and that gap-toothed smile.

He even attached photos of some amazing derp faces.  The rest of the time he’s…

Jordan provided only one reference, his epic bromance with Taylor Hall.  Epic as in ice cream dates [video] and living together.  Hallsy lets Ebs wears sweatpants and not even make his bed for a TV shoot.  They’re like baby Nicky/Mike or Toews/Kane.  He’s already a WUYS workaholic.

In the “Related Skills” portion, Ebs said he didn’t have a Valentine this year [video], but if he did he might take her for fondue.  If that’s not an attempt to charm us… how about puppies?

We did a background check and came up with a trove of hilarity.  I could post it all, but  Americans can spend their 3-day weekend Googling Eberle videos.


Hahaha, this one’s my favorite. Does he appear to be running in jeans?

Oh hey, speaking of jeans… he borrowed these from Crosby.

Included with his resume were a #14 jersey for the 2012 All-Star Game and an offer to pick us up for work in his truck.  Are those perks? Do we have to report them on our taxes?

No stops at Stamkos' house.

Chuck and I are having a staff meeting today to decide.  We obviously have to offer Eberle some kind of job – he’s not going away anytime soon.

Follow Jordan on Twitter – @ebs_14.

Taylor Hall should listen to his mom.

19 Jan

Attention hockey players,

Behold reason 2,369,067 to wear a helmet.

Warning! Warning!  This may make you queasy.

Taylor Frankenhall


You are begging….nay –  PLEADING with you all.  Please, for the love of Dear Lord Baby Jesus and Tim Tebow – wear your freakin’ helmets!  We don’t care that it is just warm-up.  We don’t care that it might mess up your luxurious hockey flow.

Do you want this to happen to you?  Do you want to have railroad tracks on your melon?

No.  I didn’t think so.

We just can’t take injuries like this.  When you hurt, we hurt.

So, please listen to your mother.  Wear your helmet.

Taylor didn’t listen to his mom.

Look at how that turned out.

Up Close and Personal

19 Dec

I don’t know where the last month has gone and I have completely neglected to put up this guest post by the lovely Jessica W!  Since @amandalitty is going to her first ever NHL game tomorrow – Blackhawks vs. Penguins (way to peak too soon!) – here’s a play-by-play of Jess getting to see her beloved Captain Serious in action.  Apologies that this is outdated but that doesn’t make it any less awesome.

The Oilers Are Not The Canucks (from Nov. 19)

It’s not easy being a Chicago fan in Vancouver, but last Wednesday, I was at Rogers Arena when my lovely Blackhawks put the Canucks on the bus and took them to school. It was a thing of beauty.

 Thinking that I had finally broken my curse, wherein I cannot have nice things such as my favorite team beating my least favorite team, I packed up my Toews jersey and headed to Oil Country. Can we just take a minute to appreciate the frigid beauty that is Alberta?

"Eat your heart out, Fauxnadians!"

After their sexy, sexy win in Vancouver, the 1st-placed Hawks were coming to Edmonton following a rough 5-2 loss to the 27th-placed Calgary Flames. The Oilers, despite their hot start to the season, were looking to end a 4-game losing streak which had landed them in 13th place.

The oldest player on the Oilers roster. (Seriously though, this is my nephew... could you DIE?!)

Here is where I add my disclaimer: I like the Oilers. A lot. I’m pretty sure they are my second favorite team. So, if what was about to happen had to happen, I was glad that it was to the Oilers.

As any good fangirl will tell you, warm-ups are the best part of the game. Usually it’s because you’re allowed to stand next to the glass, even if you have nosebleed seats. If you have have not experienced the warm-ups, I highly recommend it. Because this happens:

Oh HAI Patrick Sharp! Whatcha doin'? Oh, just having a chit chat with the equipment dude and being the HANDSOMEST MAN IN THE UNIVERSE? That's cool, please carry on.

And this happens:


Actually, let’s have more of that, shall we?

I suffer from a condition wherein the sight of Jonathan Toews in the flesh renders me a catatonic mess. That is the only thing stopping me from climbing the glass.

Oh, and did I mention I had BALLER seats?

Yes, I *may* have PVR'd Hockey Night In Canada just to look for myself on TV.

Well, as I’m sure you all know by now, after the puck dropped, all H-E-Double Hockey Sticks broke loose. In short, the Oilers played well and the Hawks crapped the bed. It was pretty embarrassing. To the point where my cousin came back after the second intermission, tossed a Taylor Hall jersey in my lap and said “You better put this on.”.  Anyway, Canadian beer is a lot stronger than American beer, so here is what I can remember:

Toews takes face-offs like a boss.

Ryan Nugent-Hopkins is an ultrasound, but he is really, really ridiculously good at hockey (5 Assists!)

Corey Crawford always looks like he’s going to cry, but when he’s ACTUALLY about to cry? It is quite possibly the saddest thing in the world. It was heartbreaking. If I was going to climb the glass for anything, it would have been to give him a hug.

Don't worry Crow... you're getting on a plane to Vegas in an hour. Go. Have a beer. Look at some naked ladies. You'll feel better. I promise.

Taylor Hall is hot. He shouldn’t be – he looks like an orangutan and a goldfish had a baby. Everything about his face is wrong, but somehow so right.

Ladies love a hatty!

Finally… you guys… Jonathan Toews watches the KissCam!

I wish I could find a nice girl like Kaner did.... *sighs*

Thank you to the lovely ladies of What’s Up, Ya Sieve? for letting me guest-post on their FABULOUS blog! Usually I just spout my nonsense in 140 characters or less on the Twitters (@jfrancesw) and this was my very first attempt at a blog. I hope it was up to the awesome WUYS standard!

Shanabanned: Andy Sutton

1 Nov

5 games for this hit on Gabriel Landeskog.

Mr. Shanahan does not like it when you mess with our Foxy Friday honorees.

Not. One. Bit.

Click [here] for Shanabanned’s ruling. 


Tweet, Tweet Love

26 Aug

I promise before the season starts, we’ll do a whole list of players and personalities that you guys should be following on Twitter.  Can we take a moment to appreciate the Tweet Beauty of Ryan Whitney?

And Now For Something Completely Different.

4 Feb

Who says the NHL is bias? Letting the Punching Pens off when J. Staal uses another player for a nail to hang his velvet Elvis? nah … If that were Ovi, he’d be on early vacation doing the turkey dance in his mankini! Do I need to post another picture of Ovi with out his shirt because I CAN?!

So this is what happens when you’re Westcoast hockey playing one of the WORST EASTCOAST teams and YET you still get it in the back end because your WESTCOAST. Read it and weep my friends but you still won’t care ’cause y’all kickin’ it east coast. I was watching this game going WTF! At least they ended up correcting themselves.

being touched by god has its draw backs

Los Angeles Kings defenseman Drew Doughty left Wednesday’s 3-1 win at Edmonton with a pair of assists. After further review, he wound up with a pair of goals instead. The first two of the Kings’ three goals were credited to forward Ryan Smyth, a former Oilers star who’s still a crowd favorite in Edmonton. Smyth got credit for tipping two of Doughty’s power-play shots past Edmonton goalie Nikolai Khabibulin. But Smyth said afterward he hadn’t touched either shot. The NHL reviewed the video on Thursday and agreed, crediting Doughty with his first multigoal game of the season.

Doughty had just 4 goals in his first 45 games for the Kings after getting 16 goals and 43 assists as a Norris Trophy finalist last season.

Does this second goal EVEN LOOK like Ryan Smyth touched it?