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You Give Us ABBA and I Raise You A LMFAO – Viktor

8 May

OK – SRSLY – I am so watching Tampa Bay now. Where have you been – Mr. Under the Radar.

I’m in love AGAIN! But that’s OK. It happens all the time. Y’all are used to it by now. With the hunt for Lord Stanley in full swing the rest of the World has this going on.

Look closely for the dancing ping pong players circling in the background. There are better things I can think of doing with those balls boys – just sayin’ if I was there.

Why can’t this get spread out … like over summer when there is a HUGE DROUGHT OF NOTHINGNESS going on?

Somewhere is Sweden there is a hotel packed to the gills with this hot mess happening (link). Varför kan inte detta vara mig på Viktor Hedmans knä?

Foxy Friday: Alex Pietrangelo

4 May

Right now, things aren’t going so good for Alex Pietrangelo and his St. Louis Blues.

They are down 3-0 to the Los Angeles Kings and are on the verge of being eliminated, their hopes to hoist Lord Stanley’s Cup almost gone.

We know what can cheer him up.

Being named a Foxy Friday!

Foxy Friday: Alex Pietrangelo

Hi. I’m Alex. Look at the perfect structure of my face.

Much like Zach Parise before him, we think that Alex would definitely be the sort of guy you’d like to take home to Mom.    Look at that face.  Adorable.

The 22-year-old Blues defenceman was part of a very talented NHL Draft Class of 2008.  He was selected 4th overall and was one of four defenseman drafted within the first 10 picks.

Also drafted in the top 10 that year – Steven Stamkos, Drew Doughty, Zach Bogosian, Luke Schenn, Colin Wilson, Mikkel Boedker, Cody Hodgson – just to name a few.

He’s the only normal one. Stamkos is a noob. Doughty’s hair is a hot mess.

His nickname is “Jello”.  When we go to see the Blues play someday, we’re totally making a sign that says “There’s Always Room for Jello!”

He has a serious bromace with Michael Del Zotto and Steven Stamkos. And when we say serious…we mean S-E-R-I-O-U-S.  Like junior high bromance level.  Pietrangelo comes across like a guy who remembers where he came from and the friends that helped get him there.  That is all sorts of foxy.

He’s a serious contender to win the Norris someday.  By all accounts, the 6’4″, 207lb d-man has all the skills required to become one of the best defenseman in the league.  While he got out to slow start in St. Louis, the organization and coaches speak so highly of him, that you have a feeling that his time will come.  Rumor has it that he has patterned his game and his shot after Nicklas Lidstrom.  And we all know what his career has been like.

Photo courtesy of Jen Krechel Photography

He has got poise. He can speak in complete sentences.  And he’s funny too.  Man knows his way around an interview.  After his NHL career is over, he definitely has a future in broadcasting.  

He has NHL in his blood.  His uncle, Frank, was a goalie for the Pittsburgh Penguins and the Hartford Whalers (Long Live the Whale!)

Other foxy factors…

  • He had 12 G, 34 A, for 46 points this season.
  • He and his defense partner, Kevin Shattenkirk (GO BU!) became the 4th set of d-men in Blues history to each record 40+ points in the same season (MacInnis/Pronger, MacInnis/Steve Duchesne, Jeff Brown/Scott Stevens).
  • Youngest player in club history to record back to back 40 point season.
  • He was the 2nd defenseman in Blues history to record 6 GWG and 6PPG in the same season.  The other? Al MacInnis.

So there you have it.  All you need to know about #27 Alex Pietrangelo, this week’s Foxy Friday.
We might be more than a little in love with him.

Our post on Puck Daddy – NHL Playoff Beard Watch: Kevin Shattenkirk, Jaromir Jagr and other freaky efforts

3 May

Back when we listed the most common playoff beard types, you may recall we included the “Maybe Don’t” category. This is the circular file where well-intentioned and enthusiastic efforts are stored until perfect attendance awards are handed out. ‘A’ for effort and all that. Since then we have admired the burgeoning beauty of many beards.

Now that the playoffs are three weeks old, it’s time to show cards on a few manscapes that are struggling to make the cut.

Read more of our article on Puck Daddy [here]…

Ready to lead a cavlary charge.

Mean Girls Club 2.0

23 Apr

After this weekend, the heat intensified over how Brendan Shanahan decides suspensions and disciplinary action. But for us women, there’s no secret. After the Campbell empire of nepotism and favoritism crumbled there was hope for a clean start. But after almost a year in the position it looks like The Plastics are back with 2.0 edition.

Here is Shanahan and Bettman at a press conference discussing the recent Torres suspension:

This is what it must be like behind closed doors when they are deciding on disciplinary action. “Well Brendan, you have the physique of a 20 year old Zack Parise shooting down the cold freshly zambonied ice on a winter classic day with a crazed Shea Weber chasing you trying to smash you head into the boards.”

shanahan simply calls it in

“Oh it’s Shea Weber? He’s popular and cute, did he hurt any one? Not really? Oh shiny objects …What were we talking about again? How manly I am? Yes. I am pretty Bad Ass. Fine him. Next. Make-up! Make sure I’m not shiny like that last video. And my hair – PLEASE!”

ask henrik if this was worth $2,500 bowl full of crazy

“Who? Bits? P-iddy? My kids love him. I went to his White party in the Hampton’s. Really – Bitzs – Oh. don’t care. West coast? SRSLY. Two games and no video and just copy what ever I said last time this happened. Rinse-n-repeat.”

My point is, discipline should be like justice, blind, fair and across the board. A hit should be judged on its own. Not if someone is hurt, not if someone is a popular or famous player, but as a stand alone on its own merits – as it were. This is simply not happening. I realize people are human but come on.

And don’t use Matt Cooke is the poster boy for this system – it was the Penguins who sat him down and said it’s your job or you’re out. That was the reason he change, NOT Shanahan or the new system.

Our Post from Puck Daddy: Joe Thornton’s Sasquatch; Brian Boyle is Inigo Montoya

19 Apr

Check us out every Thursday through out the NHL Playoffs on Puck Daddy!

April 19, 2012 –This early in the Stanley Cup Playoffs, beards are like second-round berths and regulation wins – shiny hopes and dreams. It’s barely Week 2 and, at best, most players are sporting only peach fuzz or the beard equivalent of an off-season weekend bender.

Some have already grown all they’ll ever manage.

But a few prime specimens have begun to emerge as top contenders for the coveted Beard of the Year award. Can they go all the way? Or will they be forced, defeated and follicle-free, to the back nine before they have reached their full potential?

Read the rest [here]

Don’t Be Hatin’

14 Apr

Hey there handsome! yes, I embarrassed you in front of your team, that was me

Ok, I’m starting this off with I don’t hate the Vancouver Canucks. I just happen to LOVE the LA KINGS – even more so after seeing them last night. Look at the play-off beard!

do you kiss your mother with that mouth? Mr. Canuck fan? no wonder you're with another dude at this game!

If Pants was worried about me when we went to see Ovi in SJ in my outfit, she should have chaperoned me to Vancouver in my harmless Drew Doughty/LA KINGS t-shirt last night because holy Cheesus! I was literally one of 5 Kings fans in the house and the only one with a sign. You could see it anywhere in Rogers Arena.

F%ck you camera man! Telling me I suck. I made it on the Jumbotron anyway! so suck it ... we won too!

The one question I kept getting asked last night was – Why do you like the LA KINGS? Really? I saw Mr. Cherrie hold his breath hoping against all hope I wasn’t going to say something snarky so I waited until now: (our two little friends above the exit sign where AWESOME!) HI!

1. LA has a real goal tender – Quick doesn’t cry either!

Koppie tried flipping me a puck during warm up! totes love for you.

2. LA has Kopitar who can stick handle in a phone booth and I believe is about to cut loose because he is certainly due

He's all class and no sass!

3. LA has Dustin Brown with 2 shorties on them in their barn

Capt. Downtown Brown was trying not to laugh at my sign. Quick had a giggle too along with the rest of the team giving Doughty shit.

4. LA has Jeff Carter and Mike Richards now
5. LA has Drew Doughty (of course) 😉

Drew also tried to flip me a puck during warm-ups!

Any questions? Didn’t think so.

This was totally staged for my pleasure because they were all laughing and trying not to look at me. Hello -Paging Kings Fan of One.

See ... they started laughing and 22 (Trevor Lewis) is a stone cold FOX

But I would like to give a shout out and a thanks to the gracious Canucks fans who let me stand in front of them during the warm-ups so I could watch. They were very nice about it and I truly appreciated it.

Foxy Friday: Patrick Marleau

13 Apr

Loyalty is defined as “a faithfulness or a devotion to a person, country, group, or cause.”

One might also define loyalty as “Patrick Marleau.”

Marleau has spent his entire professional hockey career with the San Jose Sharks, who drafted him 2nd overall at the 1997 Entry Draft (behind current teammate Joe Thornton).

1997 to 2012. That’s like eleventy billion years in hockey speak.

His loyalty was put to the test in 2010 but Marleau chose to not test the free agent waters, and remain with the team that drafted him. He signed a 4-year deal, worth a tidy $27.6 mil a year. You know how we feel about math (we hate it) but even we know that works out to some serious paper.

Aside from his devotion to the Black and Teal, the Sharks alternate captain is also one serious hockey player. Add to that his overall adorableness, those eyebrows, and the fact that we don’t give the Western Conference as much love as we should, we have named Patrick Marleau this week’s Foxy Friday.

Marleau is the all-time Sharks leader in goals, even strength goals, power play goals, points, shots, AND games played. Overachiever, much?

On January 17, 2011, Marleau played his 1,000th career game, becoming the third-quickest player to that prestigious milestone as measured by age, as well as the youngest player in NHL history to reach the milestone with the same franchise.

And if that wasn’t enough, he scored a goal too.


Other fun facts about Mr. Marleau that make him worthy…

  • He was born September 15, 1979 in Aneroid, southwestern Saskatchewan, (pop. 45). Not only does that make him extremely WUYS age appropriate, but he’s also from a town that sounds like something out of Star Wars (which we love)
  • His favorite band is The Tragically Hip. Of course, it is. He’s Canadian. You probably get a copy of their album upon birth, along with a pair of skates and lumberjack hat.
  • He hates loud eaters, bad drivers, and smokers.
  • Most famous people in his cell phone – Justin Morneau and Sidney Crosby. The most famous person in my cell phone is Pants.
  • He is fluent in “Toddlerese”. Wonder if you can get this on Rosetta Stone?
  • His oldest piece of protective equipment is his shoulder pads. He claims they are “decades old”.
  • Can undress out of his hockey gear in a team-low, 45-seconds. Team low? So what you’re telling me is that the Sharks had a race to see who could get naked the fastest? What we wouldn’t have given to officiate that race….

Aww shucks, guys.

Marleau finished the regular season at 30 G, 34 A, 64 pts and a +10 and will no doubt be a factor in the Sharks’ success this postseason. He will also be making a run for the Most Desirable Playoff Beard Award.
Also, his long-lost twin?
The coach from “Friday Night Lights”, Kyle Chandler!!
Seriously Foxy.

from Sports Illustrated

Sixty for Stamkos

9 Apr

Saturday was an epic hockey marathon featuring every team in the NHL.  Some games were for playoff position, others were a last hurrah.  For me, not even that killer Caps win came close to seeing Steven Stamkos score his 60th goal of the season.

And get a pie in the face.

Stop looking at Ran Malone’s tattoos and focus! [video]

Stamkos is the 20th player in NHL history to score 60 in a season.  He got 48 of them at even strength.  Probably all of them were from Squishy (not an actual statistic).  Brittany (@kneesandtoews) and I were Landeskoging all over the place.  She is the biggest Bolts fan we know (actual statistic).

Summer is already too long.

Sunday was for drying tears over the teams we won’t see again until September.  To send you all off, an adorable story about Stammer & Marty, Best Friends Forever [link].

And two post-game interviews, one regular [link] and one in which Ryan Malone’s tattoos (on his stomach?!) once again steal the show:

Broadcast News

3 Apr

Mike Milbury is talking crap again.  In other news, water is wet.

He made some derogatory remarks about Sidney Crosby is a Philly radio interview discussing the brawl at the end of Saturday’s game.  He called Sidney a “punk” and a “goody two shoes” among other things that you can read about on [link].

This cat? Smarter than Mike Milbury. (Real accidental internet gem.)

Let me say, as a huge Crosby fan, that sometimes he is a punk and a goody-two shoes.  It’s like saying sometimes Scott Hartnell is a goon – he’s still an awesome hockey player.  Ovi is lazy – we know this.  Then he lights it up and you remember why you don’t really care. (Bad example, I care about that one.)  Patrick Kane dives, Jonathan Toews pouts, Ryan Kesler gets his naked pictures Photoshopped (insists Jess).  Get over it!  You want to hate him, so you’re really just complaining about something you don’t want to stop.

Look, I don’t care if you like Crosby or not.  I could defend him for days, but loving to hate someone is half the fun!  I have been brainwashed by the Capitals and I still hate Ovi, so I get it.

What Milbury’s doing here, aside from making Liam McHugh wish for a new job, is pandering.  He knew his audience, that their blood was up about the game.  Now he’s sorry.  MY ASS, BUDDY.  He realizes now his remarks were “inappropriate and wrong?”  That’s like saying “no offense” then being really offensive, or ending an insult with “bless his heart.”  Milbury has to cover who knows how many more Pens games this season, and is suddenly worried he’ll seem foolish or biased.  Oh no, we might not respect his opinions!  I’m laughing so hard I can’t even hear what he’s blabbering about.

Milbury’s other big contribution to the world in this interview was:

[Crosby]’s not the perfect gentleman. He’s not the sweet kid you see in interviews with his hat pulled down over his eyes.”

WHAT?  REALLY?!  I’ve been waiting here ages in this dress for him to pick me up, and I’m pretty sure prom is over by now!

Does anyone think this?  Who is Milbury astonishing with this news?  Mike must be in the tanning bed between his intermission segments, because anyone who thinks that Crosby, or any player, is out there selling Girl Scout Cookies must be new around here.  (Insert vision here of Stamkos skating cross-ice to tackle Troy Brouwer after a hit – we don’t want pushovers on our teams!)

Matt Cooke, past life.

You can read Sid’s comments at the same link.  I wish he’d just said, “Does anyone care what Mike Milbury says?” and left it.  Answering only makes things worse.  (Gah! I’m doing it too!)  All that matters in the end is if you performed and if you won – and even Crosby-haters can’t argue with the scoresheet.

Since Sid won’t say it, and certainly isn’t the only player who wants to, I will.  Shove it, Milbury.  Preferably somewhere where we’re not forced to watch you.

The Kid Stays in the Picture

13 Mar




Hurrah for Gabe Landeskog on one hell of a game.

After missing the pre-game skate with flu-like symptoms, he somehow managed to tough it out and score the game-winning goal (his 4th GWG of the season) versus the Kings in OT last night.

When I have the flu, all I want to do is eat saltines, drink ginger ale, and watch bad movies like “Teen Witch”.  The thought of having to play 60 minutes of hockey when all you want to do is hurl makes me want to hurl.

I don’t know how you did it, kid.

Landeskog also had three shots in the game bringing his season tally to 235 for the year, breaking Peter Stasny’s franchise rookie record for shots set waaaaay back in 1980-81 (12 years before GL92 was even a fetus.)

The Avalanche are in a desperate fight for a playoff spot so they are gonna need every point they can get.  Last night’s win moved them into 8th in the Western Conference.

With Matt Duchene out with a ankle injury, the Avs are going to have to depend guys like Landeskog, O’Reilly, and Stasny to keep them in the hunt.  Also critical to their playoffs hopes is the goaltending of Varlamov.  He’s been playing really well as of late and last night, he looked pretty tioght.

Let’s hope that the Avs’ young talent can sustain them and keep them in the race.

Because frankly, we’d love to see more of this.


P.S.  Kudos to Landeskog for giving a very nice, poised, coherent post-game interview.  So often, I cringe every time players do post-games because 99% of them are in desperate need of media training.  But Gabe was perfect.  Kid is gonna be a superstar.