Tag Archives: New York Rangers

Scars & Cars

6 Jun

I’m not much of one for cars, especially since a certain defenseman’s Lamborghini just makes me laugh.  But scars?  For bikini season, we thought we’d bring back this gem MDZ is sporting:

“When Evgeni Malkin cut me with a skate I felt lucky to have ribs. I got 50 stitches, no staples. I’ve had to work hard on balancing my lats ever since. But I have to say, it’s a great icebreaker, especially at the beach. Like they say chicks dig scars.” – New York Rangers’ Michael Del Zotto [video – no visible blood]

What say you – do chicks dig scars?

It goes with this face.

What the What?!

24 May

Last night was bonkers.  The Devils scored three goals while I was making mac & cheese, then the Rangers got them all back.  The Rangers were bad, then great.  Brodeur had one of those moments, like in the back of a cab when you know you’re going to throw up and you have to decide: pull over or window?!

Then you don’t make either one in time.

In the end, the Devils put it away on a goal from surprisingly foxy Ryan Carter.  Where have you been all our lives?  New Jersey is now up 3-2 in the series.

Will Friday be the night we see this year’s other Stanley Cup contenders emerge?  Chuck says no.  I say Zach.

This post was just so I could use this picture.

I should have known that Pam (@itsalwayssunnyinnj) made this picture.  She is a girlgenius.

Our Post on Puck Daddy – NHL Playoff Beard Watch: Alternate Captains

17 May

The letter “A” is awarded only to the best. Students with the highest scores. Products with the best quality. Restaurants with the cleanest kitchens. We all know Alvin didn’t lead The Chimpmunks just because he had the best dance moves. The very presence of an “A” denotes greatness.

We love (OK, worship) our NHL team captains. But in life, it’s rare that a “C” should outrank an “A.”

To keep the status quo, this week we salute one NHL alternate captain from each remaining playoff team. These men are first in our books — leading by example on and off the ice, above and below the chinstrap.

Here are our top marks for how “A” beard should look.

Check out the rest [HERE]

Matt Greene’s bears. So blond, it glows.

S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y Night!

10 May

Last night’s Caps/Rangers Game 6 was officially the most fun I’ve ever had at a hockey game.  Maybe it was the Jeff Schultz Fan Club in front of us at warm-ups – hey, there really is someone for everyone.  Maybe it was the “Let’s Let Karl’s Dogs Out” sign or the Flo Rida dance party.  It could have been this hug from iCarly:

We sat with the near the best people ever.  To our left, a mom with an adorable 1-year old baby girl in her lap.  She passed said baby to dad so she could have her hands free when yelling, “Call something, you blind $&#*@*^ ref!!” at the top of her lungs.  The guys behind us were doing NHL Mystery Science Theatre 3000 – I wish I’d recorded them.  Gems like:

Person in crowd: “Let’s go Rangers!”

Guy behind us: “I can’t hear you over the winning!”

Instead of a tired, boring “Lundqvist, you suck!”, we got, “Who puts a V after a Q?!”  and a million more.  It helped reduce the tension of holding my breath for sixty minutes.

There were also a couple of goals.  (In Russian, I love the way he says, “Green.”)

Nicky lost his helmet and we all swooned like Disney princesses.  All 4 feet, 11 inches of Keith Aucoin was getting in Brian Boyle’s… well, somewhere around his rib cage, I guess, but it looked feisty.  Joel Ward got a HUGE cheer when announced in the starting lineup.  Chimera was a beast – he wanted to fight so badly, but we prefer when he scores.  Best facial expression of the night:

Holtby was outstanding.  You should see all the 70 shirts in this place now.  He woulda (shoulda, coulda) had the shutout if not for Ryan Gosling Carl Hagelin’s uncalled goalie interference, but who cares?  The moment of “Oh God, not again!” panic when Gaborik scored with 50 seconds left passed, and the game was over.

Now we’ve all got Saturday Date Night with the Rangers and Caps at 7:30 PM.  Put on your dancing shoes!

Life is Pain

8 May

Most girls will tell you there are few situations in life that cannot be explained by a scene from The Princess Bride.

After the Caps’ loss to the Rangers last night, I feel Mostly Dead.  Tortured.  Gutted.  But if you lean close enough, you might hear me whisper:

In case you missed it (what on Earth were you doing instead?!), the Caps were up 2-1 with 22 seconds to play.  Joel Ward took a high-sticking double-minor for hitting Cary Elwes Ryan Gosling Carl Hagelin in the face.  Then this happened:

Inconceivable.  WE HAD THIS GAME!  Holtby was killing it and the Caps were digging for every inch.  It was right there… and here we go into the Fire Swamp, also known as another damned overtime game.

At least it didn’t take long.  Ginger Staal scored while Ward was serving his second penalty.  And just like that – Pit of Despair.

I feel so bad for Joel Ward.  It was an awful penalty but only one of a billion the Caps have taken this season.  And he handled it like this, managing to break my heart even more:

Shake it off, JWard.  Good adventure movies teach us that all hope is not lost.  I’m not going to kill myself because none of our four fastest ships scored.  Outshot 38-18?  BAH.  I’m not left-handed either!  We are going to fight to the pain in game six.  As baby Fred Savage tells his grandfather, Columbo: “I wasn’t nervous. Maybe I was a little bit ‘concerned’ but that’s not the same thing. “

Let’s focus on game six.  Get a wheelbarrow and a holocaust cloak because we are opening that gate.  And when someone gives you a book, remember to ask:

3 AM (It Must be OT)

3 May

It wasn’t quite 3 AM, but close…

When John Carlson scores a goal, I get irrationally happy.  When that goal is assisted by Karl Alzner, I yell, “Apples to Apples!” and jump around the room.  Can we get this guy a clear mouth guard?

Sadly iCarly’s goal was not enough as the Caps lost an epic triple-overtime game to the Rangers.  I have a new downstairs neighbor (bad timing!) and will probably get an angry call from my landlord today (don’t care!) about the noise.  And the language.  But I don’t plan to settle down anytime soon.

You all thought this was in, right?  I threw my arms up… and Mr. Pants ended up wearing some wine.  Oops.

By the end of the second overtime, I was emotionally exhausted.  I can’t imagine how the players on either team felt, dragging around like anchors on a ship.  They never cease to amaze me – no one who went down for a shot block decided to take a nap or curled up against Nicky B and closed their eyes.  I know most of you were thinking about it.

This Caps team looks confident, strong and, as they have since the playoffs started, they look like a TEAM.  Even Mike Green loved us back last night with five shots on goal.  Bring on Saturday!  Give us more of Braden Holtby’s adorable parents in the stands!

I have to say the Rangers also played a heck of a game, of course.  Ryan McDonagh had over 53 minutes.  WOW.  Ginger Staal had 49-plus.  Bless their hearts if they can even get out of bed today.

Principal’s Office

15 Apr

It’s getting hot in here, and Brendan Shanahan’s phone was ringing off the hook yesterday.  Three players face disciplinary hearings for offenses committed during Saturday’s run of show…

1. Carl Hagelin

Former Foxy Friday and Ryan Gosling stun- double Carl Hagelin is not known for throwing elbows and getting dirrrty.  But the playoffs make people do crazy things.  He took out Daniel Alfredsson with a very high hit yesterday.

Alfredsson, the Sens’ captain, did not return to the game.  There’s been no update on Alfredsson’s status.  Hagelin served a five minute major and will be sentenced today.  Tortorella said “wah!” but that’s what he always says.

2. Matt Carkner

This guy is off his anger-management meds.  Boyle had a goal in game 1 and got into it with Karlsson to the tune of matching roughing minors.  It merits the clean check Carkner throws to start this, and probably a fight.  I understand protecting your most valuable asset.  But Carkner doesn’t square off, he jumps Boyle and drags him face-down across the ice under the dogpile.

Carkner got five for fighting, two for instigating and ejected.  Brandon Dubinsky was the third man into the fight and also got himself a game misconduct.  He took his frustration out on the Gatorade cooler.

This series is officially ugly.  I think Shanahan will suspend Hagelin for one game, especially if Alfie can’t play tomorrow.  The hit was directly to the head and otherwise you open it up to chaos.  If Carkner went after Boyle for a play that didn’t result in Karlsson being injured, what will they do to the guy who knocked out their captain?  Hagelin is not Boyle – he may not live to tell the tale.

Carkner definitely gets suspended here.  Fight a guy clean to protect your teammates, that’s hockey.  This is cowardice and can’t be allowed to stand.

3. Andrew Shaw

Goalies are like virgins whose fathers are right inside the front door with a shotgun – don’t touch them, it’s not worth it.  Chicago’s Andrew Shaw collided with Phoenix netminder Mike Smith last night, helmet-to-helmet. Smith went down hard and stayed there for a long time.

Shaw got a five minute charging major, on which the Coyotes scored to take the lead.  He was ejected as well.  Smith eventually got right and stayed in the game… what?  He must have passed whatever on-ice tests are administered immediately following a hit to the head, but this looked like a mandatory trip to the quiet room.  I think a five + game should suffice as Smith wasn’t injured on the play.  The hearing is tomorrow.

What do you think?  More importantly, if they don’t get what the opposition feels they “deserve,” what happens in game three?