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Had a Bad Day

28 Feb

Yesterday’s NHL Trade Deadline was a snore.  I thought Twitter might melt from all the ennui and complaints, or Alyonka Larianov’s increasingly desperate attempts to hold our interest.  Here’s how things shook out [link].

John Scott was “shocked” to be traded to the Rangers, and was in the middle of doing laundry when the call came.  Bonus points for Foxy Fridays Matt Duchene and Gabriel Landeskog, who led the Avalanche love-fest for players both coming and going by Tweeting their teammates hello and goodbye simultaneously.  Brian Rolston goes back to Boston, where he played 4+ seasons.  The winners are anyone leaving the Islanders or Jets, and anyone going to the Canucks.  The abstainer was The Washington Capitals.  The loser?  Rick Nash.  Let’s discuss.

The Washington Capitals made zero trades, surprising a lot of people.  This seems to say that GMGM either 1) thinks the team is fine the way it is or 2) has given up on this season.  In my opinion, it’s more likely that no one was buying at his prices.  The Caps chemistry is flawed and inconsistent, but it doesn’t need to be burned to the ground.  GMGM showed continued/expensive faith in stars and fragile pandas (Sasha Fierce, Mike Green).

Misplaced faith?  Ask me in six weeks when the Caps don’t make the playoffs.  But what they had to sell (Knuble, Hamrlik) really only matches the Rolston/Mottau deal, and that was for prospects.  The Caps need players who can deliver immediately.  To get those guys, GMGM would have had to give up some of the few things that are actually working for the Caps.  I don’t want Laich, Chimera, Perreault or anyone else moving when they seem to be the only hopes left for March and April.

Then there’s poor Rick Nash.   Chuck and I are biased because we love his smiley lumberjack ways.  Also because he’s incredibly talented and seems like a genuinely nice guy.  But he’s no fool.  All Nash has to show for 9 seasons with the Blue Jackets is one trip to the playoffs, swept by the Red Wings.  The only place this captain is going is down with his ship – so he finally wanted off.

Columbus GM Scott Howson revealed yesterday that Nash asked to be traded [link].  This refuted talk the Jackets were shopping him of their own accord, and came as the clock ticked down on the biggest fish in the trade pond still trying to bite a hook.  But no team would put out enough bait.  Howson defended his astronomical asking price by pointing out he is neither required nor compelled to trade Nash just because he asked nicely.

How many of these are left in Columbus?

Now, I’m mad.  Howson threw Nash under the bus.  “Think you’re miserable now?  See how it feels when I turn the fans against you!” (Obviously not a real Howson quote.)  If Rick can’t get out of Columbus this summer, my heart will break.  He wanted to anchor that team and be the franchise guy that built a winning club.  Columbus has not delivered.  The Jackets are talking about “rebuilding” – rebuilding what?!  You have one Nash-shaped support beam and no house!  You never did.

In truth, the Jackets can’t afford to sell Nash unless they immediately start winning in return.  Rick’s price tag is something between a ransom and a bounty.  He’s all they have right now, after supposed big moves like Jeff Carter are quickly forgotten.  Columbus ranks 26th overall in NHL attendance, due in part to being so close to other teams (Pittsburgh fans call match-ups in Columbus “home games.”).  Nash is putting bodies in seats on nights when no one else can.  Without him….

I also feel for the Jackets’ fans; of course they don’t want to lose their one bright spot.  These fans, all the more precious for being in an expansion market, have stuck with the team like Nash has.  I hope they understand the position he’s in.  They can still get solid players in a Nash trade.  Come summer, teams struggling to make the playoffs now will have time to figure out what a fresh start with Nash is worth.  After what will be the Jackets’ 11th rough season in a row, it’s certainly worth a try.

Don’t Let the Door Hit You…

4 Oct

Sean Avery has been placed on waivers by the Rangers.  It’s like the episode of 24 where Kim Bauer went hiking in Los Angeles, got cornered by a cougar and had to be rescued by a hillbilly in a bunker.  If she were real, she’d still be dating this jackass.

Read all about it on Puck Daddy.

Will someone pick him up?  According to the NY Post it would cost a team $1 million to have Avery for the year.  His salary is $4 million: the Rangers would pay $1 mill and the Dallas Stars are still paying $2 mill.  That’s right, two teams would pay a combined 75% of Avery’s salary to NOT have him on their rosters.  Ask The Situation how it felt when Abercrombie offered to pay him not to wear their clothes.

Avery’s effectiveness as an annoying bastard is undeniable – he rattles other teams – but he draws tons of penalties in the process.  To the equation, teams must add the likelihood Sean will do something off the ice that speaks louder than anything he does on it.  I just don’t see the point of Sean Avery.  I think any number of guys can do what he does (we’ve got “your mama” jokes galore) with a lot less headache.

This is real. I didn't Photoshop in these glasses.

So with two teams already putting their money where Avery’s mouth is… what happens now?

Ever Done This?

13 Jul

Daniel gave me this new suckie on the first day of training!

Mike Duco formerly of the Florida Panthers got traded to Vancouver. If you were him – you’d think JACK POT – right? Going from a basement dwelling team – well – before they spent a boat load of cash and made some mad trades – to an almost Stanley Cup winning team. Not a bad place to be traded too – right?

Now consider that fact that you may have tweeted some of the following things during the play-offs:

Can't send a 'please ignore' out after that one!

He also posted one that said, “HA … solid night Luongo.”

So it’s your first day at training camp with all your new friends. What’s a boy to do? I bet he didn’t write the book, “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” But I would guess he needs a copy of that stat because Luongo wasn’t too kind to Kesler after the Olympics but he did forgive him. He kind of had too. Kesler is way too hot not too.

It may not be charm, but it might work!

But Duco? Let’s hope he has charm coming out his ass. He’ll need it. Good luck buddy on your first day. I hear the Sedin’s have a wicked sense of humor.

Oh NoOvi Didn’t!

1 Mar

Combine the power of the most popular Foxy Friday Alexander Ovechkin and the last  Foxy Friday Brooks Laich, add three newbies Jason Arnott (who knew this hottie was wasting away in New Jersey and I predict future Foxy Friday!), meiner lieblinge Herr Sturm and Dennis Wideman and you will get a goal by Brooksy with 47.2 seconds left in the game to tie, send into OT and a stellar fricken old fashion OH-NOVI-DIDN’T GOAL by OVI HIMSELF OLD SCHOOL THIS IS HOW YOU DO IT KIDS!

Whew! Now THAT is why I love the Caps! And watch out East coast! Because GM GM got it done by trade deadline. Hop Mop in Pittsburgh, Ovi just traded you in for Jason Arnott. SORRY! He’s much taller. He doesn’t have the fabulous long hair but he is a better passer and Herr Sturm will give you a run for your money on speed but I might pay to watch the two of you in a backwards skate off! 😉 I still love you though. But I love the Caps more. All much more gabillion of them! Thank you GM GM.

I eat men like that for breakfast

Herzlichen Willkömmen, mein bevorzugten Herren Sturm!

28 Feb

Warum ist diese männer lächelnd?

Das ist ausgezeichnet? Ja? The Washington Capitals picked up this German born hottie-BOOM-ba-hopefully-GOAL-A-LOTTIE from another one of my favorite teams, the LA KINGS off waivers right before the trade deadline.

A first-round draft choice (21st overall) in the 1996 NHL Entry Draft, Sturm is the NHL’s all-time leader in goals, assists, points and games by a player born and raised in Germany. Das ist wunderbar! Nein?

I'm going to Washington, D.C.!

Speed has always been Sturm’s calling card, but he is also a strong two-way player (did someone say TWO WAY) with a good shot and a high compete level. At the age of 32, he should still have some useful years ahead of him if his wheels haven’t deteriorated too much. Er ist sehr snell! Das ist sehr gut für das Capitals.

He has been out with tendonitis while with the LA Kings which might be a major concern but he seems like a serious competitor. I think he’s a good gamble for The Caps. A strong player with play off experience.

“… (LA KING) They probably didn’t think anyone was going to pick me up. One of their young prospects got hurt [Friday night] and might be out for the season so they will have to get someone. I don’t care now. I am all about the Capitals and looking forward to joining the team.”

Well, I am ALL ABOUT YOU! Guten Morgen,  GutenTag  und Guten Abend,  meinen Schöenen Mann!

See ya bitches!

All Coming Back to Me Now

24 Feb

Oh boy.  Alex Kovalev is back with the Penguins. Ray “I get s*** done” Shero acquired him from Ottawa for a conditional draft pick [link].  On top of James Neal and Matt Niskanen, Shero is running down the dream here.  Today is Kovalev’s 38th birthday so I hope he wished for a playoff race.

The way back machine.

Kovalev played in Pittsburgh from ’98-’03, between stints with the NY Rangers.  As a Pen he racked up 149 goals and 197 assists in 344 games.

Disclaimer: I hate the NY Rangers. I especially hated them growing up in Upstate NY and I probably said “1940!” a hundred thousand times.  It has been many moons, but I have never really recovered.  And I’ve always disliked Kovalev, even when he was a Penguin.  Now I am prepared to eat my words.  Come on Alex, and show me how wrong I’ve been for cough…20…cough years.

Still makes me shudder.

The Pens may be close to getting Chris Kunitz back from injury, and none too soon.  They are still missing forwards Asham, Johnson, Tangradi, Letestu and Jeffrey.  Defenseman Paul Martin is out, and this morning they announced Brooks Orpik has a broken finger and will miss 4 weeks.  They have a few other injuries too – no one you’ve ever heard of.

Chuck, Beth and I are going to Pittsburgh for the March 25 weekend games.  We may be called in to demonstrate the skills we’ve learned by repeatedly watching The Cutting Edge.

Exactly, Kate.

Sasha Fierce!

23 Feb

In effort to throw the other Sasha some good karma and some love, from WUYS, here is a post just for him. I guess he was on vacation? I don’t know. I don’t care. I was thinking about the trade issue and maybe he doesn’t want to stay in D.C. under the other Sasha’s shadow which is why he is only signing one year deals. Either way, Sasha Fierce, we will love you whether you stay or go, cue THE CLASH!


lost for words for once - seriously.