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Someone we know once posted this to Facebook:

Thanks, Paul C.

Safe to say that hashtag also applies to:

Biebs skated with the Leafs  [link] in a track suit because they didn’t have any Youth Medium hockey gear laying around.  Look at his pants – I bet they’re rolled at the waist too.  Phaneuf is all, “You said Disney princesses!  I brought my Ariel lunchbox to get signed!”  I don’t think JB’s huge diamond stud earrings would fit under a helmet.

In a totally unrelated story, look which ad is featured on NHL.com today:

This triggered a chorus of “MissyouWhyPhiladelphiaagainSid’sdryerislonely” from my office.  And I haven’t even been watching 24/7!  But I’ll catch up now so as to not miss the triumphant return of Claude Giroux.  He wasn’t concussed, he was just saving up points.

Hahahahaha, NHL.com, you so funny.

Gingeroux had 1 G/3A in the Flyers win over Dallas last night [link].  He missed 4 games and still holds the NHL lead in points scored with 43.  Alright fine, you kinda like him don’t you?  Gross.

As predicted,  Pens’ Deryk Engelland will have a hearing with Shanahan today over his hit on Marcus Kruger [link].  Kruger did not play last night as the Hawks piled up on the Habs.  Corey Crawford, who has been benched in favor of Ray Emery for the last 6 games, was pretty impressive in net for Chicago.  Also applause-worthy is Jonathan Toews tying Stamkos for the NHL goal-scoring lead (it was an empty net but we’ll take it!)

Love everything about this.

Colorado won their 7the straight home game [link], which would be really exciting if they hadn’t also lost their last 9 road games.  But now they’re at .500 and they have 3 home games left before the end of the year.  They could be pulling up into the top 8 in the West pretty quickly.

And if you’re still watching, the Hurricanes blew a 3-1 lead to Phoenix last night in a really hard loss.  They are 2-6-2 under their new coach and are last in the East with just 26 points.  Apparently the fact that I really like the Canes and that their mascot Stormy is “an anthropomorphic ice hog” (Wikipedia gem) doesn’t count for much these days.  I’ll keep writing letters to Santa and maybe he can give EStaal and the boys a break.

 

You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out

I’m all for the old-fashioned let your kids play outside and get dirty, and yeah sometimes they get hurt.  They’re kids, that’s the way it goes.  But when it comes to multi-million dollar professional athletes:

WEAR A VISOR.

Martin St. Louis was hit in the face during Tampa Bay’s practice yesterday.  He suffered facial and nasal fractures that can’t even be properly determined until the swelling in his face goes down.  This is the man who, in last year’s playoffs, had a two teeth knocked out, a double root canal and was back on the ice the next day.  We know you’re tough, Squishy.  And right now you’re “out indefinitely” with an avoidable injury.

Last week Jordan Staal caught  a puck near the eye against Carolina.  The camera cut to Eric, looking worried and probably thinking, “Shit, Mom is going to kill us.”  Jordan, who has been seriously injured by a shot to the face before, was lucky to have no structural damage and didn’t miss any games.  But he has played the last two matches with a visor.

There are a million instances of visor-preventable injuries.  Hell, even Pronger’s wearing one now after his most recent stick-to-the-face.  I think visors should be mandatory.  Remember before helmets were compulsory, and how totally asinine that seems now?  As much fun as it was to watch Craig MacTavish’s curls blowing in the wind, by the time he was the only bare-headed player on the ice he looked foolish and antiquated.

I know some players hate visors.  I understand how it can disrupt peripheral vision and create distortion when you look out from underneath.  Puck Daddy’s anonymous NHL-er “The Player” made his case this week, prior to St. Louis’ injury [link].  I wear glasses for distance and it was a long-term process to adjust, especially since I don’t wear them all the time.  But you do get used to it.  And if everyone wears a visor, any disadvantage is negated.

These days, with “player safety” as much the NHL’s industry buzz-word as “Kardashian” is to gossip mags, the simple argument of “I don’t like it” seems petulant.  People don’t like wearing seat belts or eating vegetables, but it’s stupid not too.  And when you get hurt, we can’t just say I told you so.  We count the cost in man-games lost, points unscored and positions left open.

Obviously a visor won’t prevent all injuries.  There’s also the issue of fighting, which the League hates to love, and the stigma of throwing punches with a shield on.  If everyone wears a visor, does everyone ditch their helmet and whip their hair before duking it out?  Who knows.  Don Cherry thinks only wusses and Europeans wear visors.  I disagree – I think smart guys who dream of long careers wear visors.  You’re going to get hurt playing hockey, that much is clear.  Limit injuries where possible and save your blood for another battle.

Foxy Friday: Intern Takeover

Intern Jeff Skinner here – as in the ONLY ONE here.  Where is everyone today?  Jeeeeeez.  One Caps vs. Pens game and the whole place needs a day off to recover.  Since it’s Friday and we all know what that means… well, I’m just keeping this place open by nominating myself for Foxy Friday.  The WUYS girls go crazy for this photo and defy you to find something cuter:

We are having a tough start here in Raleigh, it’s true.  We’re two points ahead of NYI for last place in the East.  But you have to think positive!  I have 11 goals and 12 assists.  That’s #21 out of 738 NHL players.  Things are going to turn around with our new coach and Pants will be really glad to have Eric and Cam back on her fantasy team.

So happy weekend, everyone.  Hold a baby.  Smile with dimples.  And please, someone come back to work on Monday because I draw the line at posting about Mike Green (unless you start paying me).

Boss for a Day

Intern Jeff Skinner is off today to stand in as acting Head Coach of the Hurricanes after they fired Paul Maurice this morning.

Hard at work.

With a record of 8-13-4 and EStaal struggling mightily, this is less shocking and more standard than Boudreau going from the Caps.  Staal has only 5 goals on on 89 shots – that’s 2nd most shots in the NHL, absolutely nothing will drop for this guy.  They’ve lost 10 of 14 games this month.

Wikipedia, font of all that is true, already says that Kirk Muller has been announced as the replacement.  We’ll wait till the Canes actually do that before putting Skinner back on fridge-stocking duty.

WUYS Morning News

Mike Green didn’t make the trip to Winnipeg with the Caps, but he did take his sprained ankle to the Kid Rock show in DC last night.  He wore his only favorite sweater (seriously, he wears this more than Toews wears that suit) and that hat that makes me want to throw snowballs.  Money was raised for Mike’s So Kids Can charity.  Gator is from the D and she wanted to go, but instead we worked, A.K.A. watched Breaking Dawn, ate snacks and yelled back at the screen.  Good times all around.

At least Kid Rock looks excited.

Chicago beat Vancouver (ooh, say it again!) 5-2 with a couple of wacky bouncers.  Kaner, Hossa, Montador and Toews all had 2-point games.  And for anyone who didn’t cringe when we made Patrick Kane a Foxy Friday, he’s got a new One Goal commercial [link].

Brendan starched another shirt and Shanabanned Blues’ Chris Stewart three games for boarding Wings’ Niklas Kronwall.  This one’s ugly.

NHL.com used my favorite phrase as a headline.  Sadly it’s about Ilya Kovalchuk.  I watched this hoping actual pants would fall, but alas there is only a very pretty goal.

The Islanders introduced their third jerseys, which are pretty standard.  They’re worlds better than this yellow mess Nashville adopted, but no amount of fashion changes the fact you are still the Islanders (sorry).

The red-hot Bruins put their 6 game win streak on the line tonight vs. Blue Jackets.  Seguin’s on fire (Chuck loves) and leads the NHL in plus/minus rating with +15.  (Don’t mind EStaal down at the bottom with -18.)  Speaking of bottom of the barrel, Columbus is 3-13-1 with only 7 points on the season.  Now that I’ve said that, they’ll probably win.

Team Jacob

The Penguins are in Tampa Bay tonight and Sid will not play.  Errrrbody calm down (obviously I mean me).  Disco Dan would not comment on Saturday’s game – could Sid return?  I want him back this instant, but am also willing to await a triumphant debut in DC on 12/1 when I’m getting booed for wearing my 87 at Verizon Center.  It would be like a romantic comedy: Sid taking the ice, me dodging flying food, then Pens winning.  I can see it now.

James Neal will of course play tonight, and he’s got a 7-game point streak going (ties longest of his career).  JStaal has three goals in two games.  Stamkos and Neal are tied will 11 goals, and I like to think this means bromance rivalry.

Now boys, don't fight.

Only 8 hours 10 minutes till game time.

Independent Study

I went to look for this video and I typed “Intern Jeff Skinner” into Google. Hahahahaha.

And then Pants screamed like this and I said, "No, I am not calling James Neal for you. Give me back my phone."

Well Intern Jeff Skinner set his dimples to stun on Saturday night and had 3 points against the Penguins.  If I didn’t love him, I’d hate him.  He scored a scrappy little backhand lifter, then served up a pass to Tuomo Ruuto that was almost as cute as he is.  The third point was sheer determination – look at him trying to go through Nisky! – he would have scored it himself in another second.  Finns & Skinns, they are called.  So much cute.

 

Jeff leads his team with 7 G/10 A and 2 game-winning goals.

The Canes were 2-8 for their last 10 games and EStaal was having a very rough go of it.  He hadn’t scored in 10 games and was -16.  Saturday he moved to wing, off his usual center position, to shake things up and it worked:  EStaal had an assist and the GWG.  He’s still -17, but it’s a start.  Best part?  He watched Skinns to learn!

“I felt OK on the wing,” said Staal after the game. “It was a little bit of an adjustment, but watching [Jeff] Skinner a little bit in the first and second, I kind of figured it out in the third.” [link]

So while I never want the Pens to lose, I felt a little okay about this one.  The Canes really needed it.  Maybe it was the crap-tastic Capitals game we were at while this unfolded – at least the Pens were trying.

Not to brag, but…

While I was busy watching a Hugh Jackman movie last night, the Ghost in the Machine was drawing my fantasy hockey team.  I want this higher power to pick my outfits – look at this beauty!

When I named my team for Mike Green, that automatically meant I wouldn’t get him.  Happened last year with Getzlaf.  Good thing I didn’t name my team HOT DADS or I wouldn’t have gotten EStaal, Squishy, Ryan(e) Clow(e) or Cam Ward.

Pants is a good coach, and she babysits.

I won my fantasy league last year, thanks to a team build around EStaal.  I also had Clowe, Cam and Giordano – we’re just getting the band back together.  We mayneed a second bus for all our trophies: the Hart, Rocket Richard, Lady Byng and Letang’s solid-gold hair dryer.

I’d also like to nominate my team for Best Looking.  Just throwing it out there.  It won’t win us games, but it sure looks good in the handshake line.  Bet you can’t wait till it’s Team Photo day in the program!

Yes, there's a trophy for this too.

So, who wants Brodeur?

Mikey Monday: High Five!

ONLY 5 MONDAYS until our first hockey game of the season!!   Gator, Mr. Pants and I bought tickets for the Blue Jackets @ Caps on Monday, Sept 26.  Tickets were $10.  DISCOUNT MONDAY!

We will get bananas excited over a half-empty pre-season game.  Deprivation and too much sugar will do that.  We’ll be playoff-style freaking out in September.  It’ll be like…

That time Mike wore a suit, while EStaal and Kes wore jeans and t-shirts.  No worries, Mike.  It’s like Vegas in here – you can’t be overdressed.

PS: I miss your hair.

Staal Wedding Weekend

We hacked the Bauer Hockey Facebook page today and posted nothing but pictures of the Staals.  Oh wait, that wasn’t us?  Someone else did this?  BRAVO.  And woah.

You can see all the photos here.  But you can’t handle it. (Oh wait, that’s us.)

Ginger Staal got married over the weekend, hence the festivities.  The Staal Bros are going fast, ladies. 

From TheDManProject

Someone should find us a larger version of this photo, because it is PERFECT.  Beautiful.  Doesn’t it make you wanna get married?  Congratulations to the lucky couple, even if he plays for the Rangers!

Intern Birthday Party!

Happy Birthday, Intern Jeff Skinner!  Instead of having you write your own birthday post, we wanted to make sure you feel completely appreciated by the girls of WUYS.  You are the best (um, only) intern we’ve ever had and while we don’t have to pay you, we can take a moment to remember the highlights of your season with us:

Your first day at WUYS (seven months ago):

That time you believed “media training” meant letting Pants and Chuck cut your hair:

That time Dawn asked you what Kris Letang wore under his gear at the ASG:

That time you charmed the entire world into asking you to the prom (even if Cassy had to windsor your tie).  SWAG:

That time everyone loved you, and you realized WUYS might be on to something here:

That time you scored a ton of goals, were generally incredible and still looked this excited every single time:

Your birthday party starts at 4 PM in the conference room.  Just as well you’re 19, we’ve got Mexi-Colas and Whatchamacallit bars for everyone.  Eric and Cam have RSVP’d and well, then we didn’t bother inviting anyone else.  Best party ever!