Tag Archives: jordan staal

Points for This

9 Nov

JamesNeal.com here, reporting for duty.  James has been stuck at 9 goals for a while – Kessel Cartman has 11 and Stamkos has 10.  Do you think Steven chirps James about passing him in the stats?  What if they did it on Twitter?  We would die, that’s what.

Nealer has 14 points in 15 games, and we love every one of them.  (Stammer was 15 in 14, showoff.)  We also love that James is participating in Movember:

from mattniskanen.tumblr.com

He’s trying to make up for cutting his hair.  It’s okay, you’re forgiven.

If you were wondering what James wore for Halloween, he went as Ryan Kesler.  Right?  Feel free to recreate the ESPN Magazine “Body” Issue shot while you’re at it!  (Really, I have no idea what this is from.  Anyone?)

As always, we remain grateful for those not participating in Movember.  Not everyone can pull of the ‘stache… hey, not everyone can even grow one.  But we enjoy your hair too, Jordan.

And if you’re saving us a seat, I think we know where you can squeeze us in.

The Penguins don’t have a game till Friday, but we think there should be points available for things like this.  At least assists, right?  A third column to be used for tie-breakers, like shootout wins?  Then Stammer & Nealer could compete for who does more workout videos and we would all win.

Dumb & Dumber (& Dumber)

31 Oct

Tyler Kennedy tweeted this picture of himself & JStaal as Harry and Lloyd from Dumber & Dumber.

@tk1448

They’re a little late to the party – Toews & Burish rocked this one in ’09.  But I have to say that the Pens boys upped the ante – hats + JStaal’s wig = infinitely more frightening committed.

Now what we’re really hoping for is Ovi & Mikey to recreate this:

Glamour Shots: Pittsburgh Penguins

24 Oct

All other NHL teams have officially been put on notice.

We wish more teams would highlight their talent like this.

And by highlight, we mean take insanely attractive glamour shots of their players and create calendars which we can buy and hang in our offices and sigh dreamily over as we format excel spreadsheets, take conferences calls about monkeys, and troll tumblr for more photos.

Ladies, you know what time it is. It's sexy time.

Do not fear. I shall return.

Me too. I'm right behind him.

Hai. You're pretty. Let's make out.

Smartest guy on the team. Literally. I went to Harvard.

Czech him out, ladies.

I knew I should have combed my hair. Oh well.

Only thing missing is photo of James Neal.  If there was, you can be sure Pants would be blowing that photo up and making a Nealmobile shrine, serial killer style in some abandoned Annapolis warehouse.

Thanks to our WUYS friend Amber (@aemorgan) for the heads up.  She knows what we like.  

I was just going to say that…

14 Oct

Sam Kasan’s reports from Penguins practices are daily gold and you should never miss them.  But today, it’s truly special [link].

In honor of Crosby being cleared for contact, he dedicates Weezer’s cover of Britney’s “(Hit Me) Baby… One More Time.”  (Warning: it sounds a lot like the time I sang it, in costume, at a BU Halloween Party).  And the James Neal caption below couldn’t have been better if we’d written it ourselves.

Word on the street is that Flower recently got engaged.  Can we get an “awwwwwww?”  Can he have all Pens groomsmen and swear at them as they approach the receiving line, like in the 24/7 shootout?

Can I carry the rings? No. Flowers. No. Can I have the bridesmaids? Maybe.

Sunday with the Pens

25 Sep

The Penguins hosted a town hall-style meeting today for the season ticket holders and any woman under the age of dead.

Staal, Fleury, Letang, Malkin, Crosby

You can watch the highlight video [link] and bask in the combined happiness of these guys.  No one bothers to ask Geno why he’s wearing Ovi’s jeans.  Watch Sid take the ice… we see you looking. 😉

Flower’s all self-deprecating and Kris defends his hot workout video after Sid calls it fake.  If that’s the magic of Hollywood, count us in.

Sid wanted to be a firefighter when he was younger.  We’d be burning down the office every week.  And this – better than Christmas:

Classy Dan also spoke to the crowd [link] and so did GM Shero [link].  This was after Sid participated in a controlled scrimmage at practice today [link], and looked pretty damned happy about it [link].  I swear he drinks a gallon of milk a day.  Just looking at him makes me want to take vitamins.

You may recall that Jordan was mad about my Hawks-centric post before their game the other night.  He shut me up with two goals on the way to a 4-1 win.  Well he heard about the Caps Convention yesterday and put me in my place again with this shirt.  We’re buying him one for every day of the week.

He’s Just Not That Into You

22 Sep

There was panic in loveland when Patrick Kane moved his locker stall from next to Toews’ to across the room.  Aw, did somebody stay out too late and have to sleep on the couch?  You know Kaner drinks right from the OJ carton too.  Tazer hates that!

"Girls have cooties. Yes, all girls. Always."

Okay, I had a whole post going in my head but I can’t find the picture I wanted.  Until I came across this and everything ended.

Anyway, PK moved away from JT because there’s no room for the media to bask their individual awesomeness when they’re right next to each other.  He left Tazer a Post-It Note explaining the trail separation and Jon filed it in his coupon keeper. Errrrbody relax.

Hey, look who plays tonight!  Good thing I ordered the NHL Network while sitting in traffic this morning.

Jordan thinks this post makes my loyalties unclear.

As always, GO PENS.

I Love You, Tomorrow.

20 Sep

Mr. Pants needs to be on the Food Network so I can retire and just blog all day.  There are so many good things!

You’ve all heard by now that the Crosbot is practicing with the Pens.  He’s not cleared for contact, but aren’t you just glad to see this face?!

Here’s the post-practice interview [link].  This whole thing just makes me want to do the Sidney Crosby dance.  Ask Gator, she’s seen it.

Now I don’t want to get too far ahead of myself.   It makes no sense to eat all your Twizzlers before the movie starts, right?  So I’m just going to post this picture and say nothing (muffled incoherent squealing).

Geno had 2 goals in the Black & Gold scrimmage, and said his knee feels as good as new.  I cannot wait to see him skating!   JStaaaaaaal also had two goals, and has been practicing on a line with Kunitz and the Nealmobile.  Man, I am going to freak out if that’s how this season starts. Post-game interview [link].

The Pens have their first pre-season game tomorrow against Detroit.  It’s Pants vs. Gator, Round One.  Check out the website graphic – last game was end of last season.  Get that crap out of here!  Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to order the NHL Network.