Tag Archives: Jeff Skinner

Intern Jeff Skinner Gets A Day Off

2 Nov

We work Jeffy pretty hard around here, what with all the photocopying and heavy lifting and runs to the store to get our supply of twizzlers and mexican coca-cola.

But today, we decided to give him the day off.

Because when you work THIS hard, you deserve it.

Go Jeffy Go!

Foxy Friday: BioSteel Sports Camp

26 Aug

Okay, they earned it. Videos and photos and… thank heaven for this week.  And for Alyonka Larionov (person I am most jealous of in the world!)’s Twitter photos.  Who said something about Seguin wearing the heck out of a suit? Did you ask for a t-shirt?

That sound you hear is Chuck's lifeless body hitting the floor.

And Stamkos showing off (approved):

There's a "throw me up against the wall" joke here...

I obliged Intern Jeff Skinner and did a single pull-up at the gym yesterday.  Almost popped my shoulders out.  I can plank and run and lift… but not like this.  I get woozy just thinking about it.  Not enough BioSteel in the world to get me through 1/10th of what these guys do.

Impressed yet?

He doesn't even look tired.

What you really want is video of Biz doing yoga in his unders.  You got it.

And hey, look who got 10 seconds of camera time?

Frankly, this is not enough.

So that’s Foxy Friday – the boys working it out because they can’t wait to get back together with you.  Now if this hurricane really takes us all out, at least you saw Biz in his skivvies.

Intern Desk: You Want More?

24 Aug

Not enough, eh?  

Intern Jeff Skinner here – still working out.  I’ve been working out for DAYS.  Hey Pants, where’s Logan Couture this weekend?  Oh right, hosting golf.   You weren’t invited?  Maybe I’ll send you a ticket to the gun show.  Heck, two tickets and you can sit next to my Calder Trophy.

Of course, the better I get the more Stamkos hogs the video by doing twisty things and almost showing his long hair.  Then cue the squealing again when he starts doing squats.  (Seriously, someone hold Gator’s hand.)

On lunch break, over wheat germ and Power Bars, I made a deal with Pants.  Continued BioSteel Camp videos if she does a pull-up at the gym tonight.  Just one.  In return I will steal every hat Stamkos packed.  Wish her luck.

Intern Desk: Field Report

24 Aug

Intern Jeff Skinner here, reporting from the field.  Is there some kind of dictionary for girls?  I cannot understand a word said in the WUYS office since that Kris Letang video.  It’s like an Justin Bieber concert!  Sure, he makes carrying Pants’ purse look waaaaaaay too easy but I am an athlete too.  And I’ve been getting pretty buff this summer.

The BioSteel Sports Camp is on now, and since workout videos are all the rage I’m pretty happy with this one.  You don’t see Biz doing any lifts, do you?  Seguin’s not pumping any iron in these clips!

Of course they film Stamkos doing plate hauls while I’m doing dead lifts – dead lifts look so stupid!  Not that you would notice, because Gator fainted and had to be revived in time for the earthquake drill.

The BioSteel Camp is tough – and I can concentrate now that my phone battery melted.  I need an external hard drive to process all the texts I got:

Chuck: Incoherent punctuation-riddled messages about Tyler Seguin checking himself out in every reflective surface

Gator: Streaming video from Legally Blonde so I can cut Stammer’s hair, or at least get him to Bend & Snap

PantsWhy is no one paying attention to James Neal?!  Nealmobile! Followed by the word HONK about two hundred thousand times.

It’ll be so easy for me to change the water cooler bottle this season – the WUYS girls are going to love it.  Now you can watch the video if you promise to speak English again and stop squealing.  And pay my cell phone bill.

Our Friends Party with the NHL

23 Jun

Loyal WUYS correspondents @jfrancesw and @chialo managed not to get arrested last night at the NHL Awards party.  And they took a photo just for me!  I fangirlled right out of my socks.

"Skinner and Stamkos! (especially for @shan_apolis)"

What could top that, you ask?  @jfrancesw and the man himself.

Man of the Hour

I should definitely be at an open bar party with Jeff Skinner.  Can you hear me now, talking about intern interviews and Mexi-Colas?  I’ll wear a wire so you can all witness it.  Somehow @chialo managed not to faint when meeting Disco Dan.  I would be dead.

Classy coach is classy.

Then Jonathan Toews made an appearance at the party, just to make sure no one was left alive.  Thank you for sharing your pictures with us!  You look so composed, we are proud.  And insanely jealous and planning next year’s trip right now.  Meet us there?

The NHL Awards Nearly Kill Us

23 Jun

I alternate between muting and leaving the room when I’m uncomfortable with what’s on TV.  So I watched the NHL Awards in fits and starts and really tried to only listen when a player was talking.

The show was fairly agonizing, featuring some of the flattest jokes possible.  I generally think Jay Mohr’s pretty funny but the obnoxious thing is a bit much for a whole show.  Why doesn’t Cabbie on the Streets host this thing?

Like a boss.

Worse were the guest stars, most of whom stretch the definition of star to its limit.  A kid from The Wizards of Waverly Place? Awesome that he’s a Kings fan and probably fangirlling inside over Luc Robataille, but presenting?  Of course he was worlds better than the Real Housewives.  I thought I was having a stroke when they were introduced, because surely that cannot have happened.  Then Far East Movement performed.  PICK A DEMOGRAPHIC.  TEACH IT HOW TO PRONOUNCE YOUR WINNERS.  Or let Jon Hamm do them all.

Take us with you!

Okay, end rant.  The players, as usual, were adorkable enough to heal all wounds.  Jeff Skinner’s stuttering acceptance speech made me squee.  St. Louis for the Lady Byng was fantastic – someone get this guy an advert deal with Blackberry!  The constant cuts to Toews looks pissy, Bobby Ryan’s mom all teary, Kesler’s hair… man, I love hockey.

If we were in charge, the NHL Awards should we be better.  Like a bachelor auction or a live action SCORE! The Hockey Musical.  And we’d get picked up by this bus… and miss the whole show.

This isn't where I parked my car!

Now, let’s party.  We don’t know where this bus is going and I promise, we don’t care.  Back in October!

Intern Jeff Skinner: SHINY!

23 Jun

I went to work early this morning and put the Calder Trophy on Pants’ desk.  It’s really shiny.  Then I drew a (second) mustache on her Logan Couture poster and now I’m buying myself a huge breakfast on the corporate card.

I’m not bragging, but I did win.  And Vegas was really fun, even if Tyler Seguin never returned my calls about how to go out dancing when you’re clearly underage, or what the point is of wearing a belt.

In case you didn’t see my speech, I was kinda nervous.  Okay super nervous.  It was like prom times a hundred and I hope all the Seventeen readers (and WUYS girls) were pleased with the suit they chose.  I thanked everyone I could think of – I mean everyone – but I forgot to mention Pants.  I felt so terrible that I made Couture drunk dial her and sing the Jaws theme song from the pool party.

If only they’d done the Calder at the end of the show, I’d have felt better.  It was all awkward all the time and at least I didn’t have to hug the Real Housewives!  I mean, girls make me nervous enough already.

Now that I am an award-winner, I might have to ask for a raise.  Or an allowance.  The girls know I work hard and I’m really good at organizing the ponytail holders they leave around the office (thin for everyday, thick for the gym).  They could pay me Canadian minimum wage, and I could do yard work.  Gotta stay in shape so I can win more awards next season.