Beauty School Dropout

25 May

Monday I said, “Can we get an off-season photo of Steven Stamkos?”  If he started wearing a ponytail for the summer, I want get my crying out of the way before workout videos start to pop up.

Today, VOILA.

This video of Steven accepting an award for being Steven-tastic not only includes him talking on a child’s plastic telephone and being chased around a Christmas tree by a toddler in a pillow fight, but also HE CUT HIS HAIR.

YAAAYY…WAIT.  I’m not sure we’re going on by his ear – can someone just push his hair back there?  With the super-high collar, this look is a little too “nervous religious-affiliated high school graduation”  for me.  Is it too short?  Too vanilla?

Uh oh, I kinda miss the long hair!  Just a little flow, like this:

Nothing crazy, like when he was working weekends pumping gas for gator trawlers in the Everglades:

No?  I’m just used to looking through 3D glasses and now the world seems all flat and ordinary?  This was really the best:

Can you argue with advertising campaigns?

I hate to start asking already if it’s October yet… I’ll try to hold off.  Stammer was having a shoulder issue late in the season, and says it’s feeling better after a month off [link].  He’ll be in Vegas for the NHL Awards, accepting the Rocket Richard trophy for his 60-goal performance and as a nominee for the Hart Trophy.  There’s a negative-seven percent chance he’ll have any kind of tan, so pack your sunglasses.

This is what happens in summer, y’all: style consultations and gratuitous cross-sports graphics.

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4 Responses to “Beauty School Dropout”

  1. Casey May 25, 2012 at 10:51 am #

    my ovaries are about to explode. Stammer and kids? AHHH!!! I love it. ❤ During these next 4 horrible months of little to no hockey, I will come to these videos and be satisfied.

  2. Chuck May 25, 2012 at 11:03 am #

    “this look is a little too “nervous religious-affiliated high school graduation”
    DYING.

    I happen to love boys with hockey flow and that 2nd photo is really working for me. Especially the I’ve-been-a-naughty-boy-lip-bite.

    Photo #4 – phowar.

  3. Ness May 25, 2012 at 12:47 pm #

    A Stammer AND Grease reference in the same post? A+

    I really liked the longer hair but this could be because I’m Canadian and the long hair has some sort of redneck appeal that I am hardwired to be subconsciously attracted to…

  4. MouthGuard May 25, 2012 at 5:39 pm #

    His personality is growing on me… slowly. This is a good thing because on a purely plastic level, I have never given him a second look – up or down. I prefer him with the Spicoli-esque flow. It softens his face and makes his eyes look a lot less squinty.

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