Memo from the Intern Desk

3 May

Hello.  Intern Jeff Skinner is still here.  I bring bagels.  I held Pants’ hair while she got sick after that 24-hour implosion by all that she holds dear.  What does an intern have to do to get a post around here?

One for me, none for you.

How about score 2 goals against France in the World Championships?  Because I did.  I’m also hanging out with Rick Nash and James Neal and you’re not, so there’s that.  And we’re in Slovakia – good thing Pants and I watched Eurotrip before I left, because I know not to drink absinthe or mess with mimes.

Team Canada has gone 2-0 and outscored our opponents 13-2.  While you read this, we are tied 3-3 with Switzerland in the third period.

Oh, I also got nominated for Rookie of the Year.  I know Pants has a weird thing for Logan Couture but you’d think I would get some brownie points for remembering she likes Whatchamacallit candy bars.  Who else eats those?  The most fun part will be going to Las Vegas… and not being allowed to do anything.  Couture and Grabner are both 21 – can I help it if I am a phenom?  Does “I know Eric Staal” carry any weight out there?  Maybe someone will throw an 18+ night so I can at least show off my dance moves.

I'm 21. Um... my ID?

Wish us luck in the World Championships.  I know the WUYS girls are a little caught up at the moment, but Administrative Assistants’ Day was last week and it wouldn’t have killed them to make me a cake.

Get it? I'm Scotty from Eurotrip? (Pants, I know you're laughing.)

All you Fauxnadians better pay attention and cheer for me.  It’s going to be a long summer and there’s no one else to file all your Kris Letang photos in order of descending percentage of whipping his hair.

Sorry, gotta go.  Overtime! (Follow at

Update: Oh hey, we won!  Thanks for your support.  Play your Bryan Adams extra loud today, for maximum Canadian celebration.


5 Responses to “Memo from the Intern Desk”

  1. AYF May 3, 2011 at 9:46 am #

    Love it! Love all your posts. Always makes me laugh and puts a smile on my face.

    Thanks for the funnies.

  2. Shi May 3, 2011 at 9:49 am #

    Hey Jeff, you may want to let the iihf know that their team photographer is terrible. I see no jazz hands anywhere in those team photos! Add more glitter and get back to me.

    • Shi May 3, 2011 at 9:51 am #

      And hey, congrats on the win little buddy! Have an O’Douls on me

  3. Seriously Pissed May 3, 2011 at 1:29 pm #

    Jeff, you’re wonderful, but I have to pull for Grabner for Rookie of the Year, if for no other reason than he deserves something for having to play on the Islanders.

  4. Chuck May 4, 2011 at 11:56 am #

    Hey Intern Jeff – did you forget that we gave you your very own cubicle after you scored those two goals at the World Championships!

    And a new shiny stapler!

    That’s gotta be better than a cake, right?

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