Mike Green Paid For This

20 Sep

I just laughed so hard at my desk that my intern came in to see if I was crying.  Mariah Carey?  Mike Green, you are too much.

Chuck had a brilliant idea: Mikey Mondays! I will see her blatant attempt to restrict my ramblings to one day a week and raise her with another edition of:

Mike Green Paid for This – Episode 2: Mike’s Lamborghini

Remember the scene in Batman Forever where Chris O’Donnell’s Robin goes joyriding in the Batmobile?  When he pulls up to some girls and says, “Wanna go for a ride in my love machine, baby?”  Well that is really happening here.

No skates in the car.

Elephant in the room much?  I can’t not do a post about Greener’s most ostentatious possession: a white 2006 Lamborghini Gallardo.  It’s too obvious.  It cost about $150k and I bet it plays “Smack That” by Akon every time you turn it on (totes a custom upgrade).  You are not allowed to eat drive-thru in Mike’s car, nor are you allowed to touch his stereo.  Because he is, in all seriousness, listening to Mariah Carey:

He loves to sing along.

The NHL Network did this “Day in the Life” segment where Mike rocks his accent and drives past the White House on his way to work. So anyone thinking about stalking him by following the unmissable car home from the Verizon Center (no Chuck, I am NOT) should choose another ambush location.  Wait, does the Secret Service protect Canadians?  Anyway, the Cribs clip shows just about everything but his house number, so he’s pretty much home right now waiting for you to come over with a pizza and beer.  Extra pepperoni.

Mike lives across from this charming vacant lot.

I’m struck by both the urge to laugh and to lay across the hood in my bathing suit.  There are not many guys who can pull off a Lambo, and even those who can really shouldn’t.  I’m not sure which category Mike falls into yet.  (I’m treading lightly here because Marc-Andre Fleury also has a Lambo and if you make fun of him, I’ll beat you with a blocker.)

Mike, that's my jacket. Seriously.

What do you think – hot or not?  Overcompensation?  Would you rather come across Mike driving his Escalade or Bentley?  Personally, I think if you’re gonna go for it, go all out.  Then get sponsored by GEICO just in case something happens to your dream machine.

2 Responses to “Mike Green Paid For This”

  1. Erica September 21, 2010 at 10:09 am #

    Mike is channeling Mark Feehily in that last photo. Just sayin’

    Mike Green should not be driving this car. I can’t take him seriously. He just looks like he is trying SO HARD to be cool and that is just sad.

  2. Pants September 21, 2010 at 10:32 am #

    OMG, maybe that’s why I like him so much! He’s Fee! And he’s going to come out of the closet later, another in the long line of guys surprising no one but me. (He’s not. He’s too… Canadian.)

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